roses bite - tyrus

tj| viii: imagine

"right. talk. and don't give me all that crap tyler." amber storms into my room. i place my copy of romeo and juliet down, on my bedside table, whilst my sister sits at the end of my bed, cross legged.

"okay, so i noticed cyrus was having a shit morning when he text me, he didn't say good morning or have a smiley face at the end of the message, so i knew something was up, and then of course i couldn't speak to him on the bus so i guess that put his mood down even more. then his only few friends have been fairly busy recently so i snook to the back of the school, where all them flowers are and cut off a rose, may or may not have taped it to the inside of his locker to make him smile and brighten up his day."

"you hopeless romantic... this still doesn't explain that whole outing him."

"yeah i was getting there bambi, so i'm assuming reed must have followed me to get the rose and back to his locker, apparently there were photos of me according to lester. anyway, he saw me place it inside and used it as blackmail. if i didn't get a photo of cyrus with the rose, reed would out me? i guess i don't know, i'm not really sure what i am i guess."

"what do you mean by that? and i'm not judging you."

"girls throw themselves at me, mostly because of my popularity right? but i don't feel anything for them, i just feel empty, like it doesn't feel right. but when i'm with cyrus i get all these fluttery feelings and i notice all the cute little things he does and i've screwed it all up haven't i ambs... i- i think i like cyrus as more than a friend. it's like i'm open with him, but closed off about this one thing because he's my world and i don't want everything to come crashing down. i would sacrifice everything for him. he's perfect to me and all the quirks and dorky trait he has just fills my heart."

i lay down on the bed dramatically, spreading across amber. "sounds like you really like him." i can feel her fingers in my hair, reassuring me that everything will be fine. ever since our lives went to shit after mom left she always did this until i fell asleep, reading romeo and juliet to calm me down, playing elvis presley's vinyl on the player. it always worked.

"i'm the reason that mom left."

"no you're not, don't ever say that."

"no i am. i really am. there was this one guy, in sixth grade, i was like madly crushing on him and i was so confused because i'd always been told to like girls, and i remember coming home one day, dad was on a late shift and you were at a sleepover with kelsey. i asked mom if i could speak to her about something that had been irritating me. and so we sat down, she took my hands in hers and said 'you can speak to me about anything' and that made me relax, thinking oh this will be fine, everything will be fine she will still love you. and so i said to her about this guy and how insanely good looking and how funny he was and how i was so sure i was crushing on him. and her face... god her face, i can still picture it now she was shocked at first, but soon the look of anger came on her face. she hit me, and i remember my eyes watering and she sent me to my room. i didn't dare leave my room that night. i remember when dad came home, i heard them arguing, about each other, mom brought me into it saying i was a fag, dad shouted at her even more. she stormed upstairs, i hid in my covers even more. i didn't hear much for the next twenty minutes or so, and then heard what sounded like a suitcase and the front door slamming shut. i was still crying, crying at what she said crying for leaving us. dad walked into my room, wiped away a tear from my cheek, kissed me on my head and went to his room."

i hear amber let out a shaky breath and look up at her, bringing my thumb up to her cheek, wiping away a tear. "tj, i had no idea, i'm so sorry." i say nothing, only shaking my head slightly. "so um, why don't you tell me more about your fat crush on cyrus? y'know he's a pretty great guy, i had to teach him dance, cause he dropped physical education, he was adorable."

"seriously?" i lean up onto my elbow and smile. "i gotta see that! i just- he's quirky and adorable and his smile. we have a special place y'know? the swings, it's were we first spent time together. i gave him an underdog, which is how he got one of his nicknames."

"how did you two meet?"

"he wanted a chocolate chip muffin and couldn't get one so i helped him."

"let me guess that's another one of his nicknames?" i laugh and nod my head a blush spread across my cheeks. "dude just tell him how you feel, from what i've seen he adores you, and he's into guys."

"i don't know, bambi, it's hard."

i rest my head back down as we talk about meaningless things.