It's annoying to know that I can't have any time by myself in this life of mine.
I'm either at school, surrounded by family or flooded with trillions of phone calls that I don't want to answer.
It's almost as though I'm unable to make my own decisions nowadays, from people making me do things that make me uncomfortable or just ignore what I say.
Sometimes I just want to scream out in how much pain I am in but I know that nobody would care.
I feel as though I only have around 5 true friendships, and my mum says it's because we don't rely on one another every second of everyday.
It scares me when people shout, which is why I don't like people being loud. I've always sectioned it with terror or selfishness.
I don't understand why people shout at me just because I don't react to their childishness.
If you call and I don't answer, don't call again.
If I say something that you don't like, ignore it.
If I annoy you, leave.
If you dislike me, don't talk to me.
If you cry over me, you're wasting your time so, stop.
Don't blame me for anything but the things I've done that I know are wrong. But if I have no wrong doing the just leave me alone.
It annoys me when, just because someone else is upset, I have to be upset.
All I want to do is fall asleep as never wake up but that will never happen.
I've just kind of come to the conclusion that I need to let go of the friendships that are not what I thought they were.
But all I need to say is that,
If I don't respond don't believe that I don't like you, understand that I need to be alone, even just for a couple days.
I feel like that's selfish but if it's what I need to do then I will.
If I'm not important to someone then they'll just leave, and I'm okay with that.
But one thing is for certain,
You can not leave then just stroll back as if it's nothing, because it's not.
