Crossing Over

Twenty Five

It was starting to become a habit for there to be sobbing from behind one door or another in the house. By that point, Dae could only imagine how many tears had soaked through the wood of the floors. Perhaps the foundation was more salt than concrete from the years of crying people had done within its walls. 

She hesitated outside the door when she didn't hear anything. There weren't sobs coming through nor was there the sound of things being smashed. What did catch her attention however, was the smell of smoke. In a panic Dae threw open the door. 

Yoongi lazily looked over his shoulder at her before turning back to the open window. "Shut the door," he said quietly. 

Dae obeyed without batting an eye. She had gotten used to Yoongi's attitude being off putting but there was none of the usual snark. Instead she saw a vulnerable boy in front of her who hadn't had the chance to become a man. Just shy of his eighteenth birthday his life had went entirely in the wrong direction. It almost felt as though her heart was swelling as she looked at him. The brief glimpse had showed her red rimmed eyes and unshed tears. His expression had held more hurt that made him look almost fragile. 

"I'm not going to ask if you're okay because I know you're not. But I also don't want to just leave you alone so please don't ask me to." 

A deep sigh left Yoongi. He placed a cigarette back on his lips and took a long drag before ashing it against Dae's window frame. "It's your room. I can't tell you to leave." 

It wasn't an invitation to stay but at least it wasn't a direct order to leave either. "Good. Then I'll just sit her quietly with you if you'd like." She took a seat across on her bed across from the desk he was sitting on. Had the situation been any different she would have been yelling at him for smoking in her room. She was positive Jin would smell it the moment he stepped upstairs and she would get a nice long lecture about it. 

"You know smoking is bad for you, right?" she asked instead with a small smile. 

Yoongi studied the burning tip of the cigarette for a moment before smiling back at her. "I'm already dead, I don't think cancer would stand a chance." 

"What about second hand smoke?" she raised an eyebrow in challenge. 

"Fair point," he stubbed the cigarette on the frame until it was no longer burning then dropped it to land in the grass outside. "All gone. Nothing to worry about." 

"If only it were that simple, huh?" she asked quietly. 

The smile didn't reach his eyes as he looked over at her. "You have no idea. Nothing is ever that simple, but it's nice to pretend that it is." 

She considered her words carefully before speaking. "What are we pretending tonight?" 

He gave a quiet laugh in response. "Can we pretend that I'm not a dead fuck up who never mattered to anyone? How about that my parents didn't give me up for adoption just because it was too early in their careers for a kid? Or that maybe, just maybe, we can pretend that the first person who ever looked at me like I was more than a disappointment isn't downstairs trying to stick her tongue down your brother's throat right now?" 

His quiet voice had grown louder with each word near the end so that he was practically yelling at Dae. She sat quietly and took it. She didn't flinch as the words were hurled at her. Instead she kept her face calm and held eye contact. His chest was heaving as though he had just ran a mile. 

"Life sucks, I get that. All three of you here were dealt a shit hand and there is nothing we can do to change that," she got up from the bed and started towards him. "But isn't that why I'm here? I can't erase the past but I can help you guys move on. I can help you get past the world that has you tied to it." She stopped in front of him and placed her hands on his shoulders so that she was looking down at him. "Just one more week, right?" she asked softly. 

Yoongi slumped on the desk and leaned forward. It had been years since he had done anything near this but he reached out and wrapped his arms around Dae. He let himself break down as he clung to her and she gently held him. His anger had been a constant shield for him. As long as he was angry, he didn't have to be hurt. He didn't have to let anything get to him or acknowledge the pain that he had been put through. Yet along came Dae and that anger melted. His temper couldn't come out around her. He also couldn't douse his feelings with that anger and ignore them. Years of neglect, abuse, and abandonment came to the surface and he cried into her shoulder. Her hand slipped down to softly rub his back. 

"You're almost there, just one more week. Just hold on for one more week," she whispered to him. "Then it'll all be okay." 

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Each ghost has his own background revealed now. I'm still not sure which one makes me more emotional.