At school I'm working on a presentation about westward expansion
But westward expansion SUCKS so instead I'm going to be talking about the French Revolution.
(Also the picture is one of the slides in my presentation uwu)
After the Revolutionary war England decided 'well I lost that sucks guess I'll go back to fighting France then!"
So England flew out in one of his planes and started dropping magic bombs everywhere that turned everything in France into scones.
"OH MON DIEU!!!!" Cried Francis. "SACRE BLEU ANGLETERRE!!!!!!!!"
Also I just realized what sacre bleu means... and fancy Nancy says it
Lol
"Lolololloollolloool France you wanker that's what you get for existing" laughed England as he flew away.
So then France got all pissed off.
"I want someone to DIE! HEY MY BELOVED CITIZENS!! SINCE IM FEELING PARTICULARLY VIOLENT RIGHT NOW, LETS KILL LOUIS XIV!!!"
So that's how to French Revolution started. Everyone killed the king and queen.
"OHONHONHOHNOHNHONHON " laughed France. "NOW IM GOING TO SPEND ALL MY MONEY ON THE BIGGEST BAZOOKA EVER"
So he did that. Except he forgot to get missiles so it was essentially useless.
So not only were the French super confused and uncertain after killing the leader, but now they had no money.
"Well sacre bleu" Said France. So he decided to call America, who was allied with him during the Revolutionary war. He cleared his throat as he prepared to speak fluent American.
"Hey what's up Francey pants?" Said Alfred over the phone.
"Quoi de neuf mon gars? #yoloswagrekt2k19" replied Francis.
Lol my French teacher taught me that and it's amazing because that's how I talk
"Heh sorry I don't speak Korean " Said Alfred.
"GIVE ME MONEY SI VOUS PLAIS" Francis screamed.
"Oh okay but only if you give me Louisiana "
"D'accord , go ahead."
So America got the Louisiana purchase and that's when western civilization started. BUT THATS BORING LETS GO BACK TO FRANCE AND ENGLAND.
So now that France had money, he could buy missiles for his bazooka and blow up England. The end.
YOU ARE READING
Draw a circle that's how straight we are (hetalia crackshots)
Fanfictionhetalia oneshots ~ terrible xreaders and ships