Aching for Adam

Chapter 16

ADAM

I need to talk to you.

Six words that had left me in complete shock. My heart had started racing when I saw who the text was from, and I couldn't make sense of it. Was I still drunk from the night before?

Obviously, it was because she wanted to tell me about the pregnancy. Unless it was something else—something completely random. Maybe she just needed a reference for a dentist?

Yeah, fat chance.

Was it going to be a "Rick made me pregnant, and I need to tell you because I owe you that much" talk, or a "I'm pregnant because you're the father" talk? A smile crept to my lips as I thought about the second version.

I hadn't even considered the possibility that I could be the father. And why did that thought make my heart leap instead of scaring me senseless?

Hope sparked inside me. I tried to smother it, because if it turned out not to be mine, it would crush me—but it grew anyway, wildly and uncontrollably. Before I knew it, I was picking out baby names in my head.

I hadn't thought about being a dad in the last four years. Not once. Not even with Jasmine. But suddenly, there was nothing I wanted more in life.

Nothing more than having a family with Elle. And I couldn't believe it might actually be true.

I knew things hadn't been going well with her and Rick—at least according to my sister—so maybe there was a real possibility of a second chance.

Still, I didn't want to get carried away. I didn't want to show up at her place full of hope only to get gutted. I waited for the initial excitement to die down before going to her apartment. I just prayed Tam hadn't told Elle that I'd asked for her address, in case I lost my nerve at the last minute.

But whatever Elle had to tell me, I needed to see her. I needed to hear it face to face—whether it was good "we're tied together forever" news, or bad "we'll never see each other again" news.

Things escalated in my head the moment I stepped inside her place. I did my best to hide my smile when she told me Rick had moved out. I waited for her to say whatever she had to say—but nothing came. She just stood there, frozen. So I assumed it was bad news, and I blurted out the first thing that popped into my head.

This wasn't going well.

I struggled to keep calm.

She seemed distressed, her hand pressed to her chest like she was trying to soften the blow for me.

I wanted to console her—but I also wanted to run, to escape the hot knife that felt like it was plunging into my chest.

I should have quashed every ounce of hope before I ever came here. Anger started to boil—not at her, but at myself.

ELLE

"Yes... great... I'm just great... Look, it's fine... you can go..." I couldn't bear to see him look at me like that a second longer. Well, good luck with your baby. Not exactly what I had been expecting.

"It's fine, stay calm," I kept repeating to myself in my head.

He got up and walked toward the door, turning just before leaving.

"You know, I'm not sure why you wanted to talk to me. It's not like I contacted you or gave any indication I still wanted to be part of your life. I let you move on. And now you summon me here to rub salt in the wound? When you know how I feel about you? I didn't think that was like you. I thought... I thought maybe... that's why I came, but... whatever. Goodbye, Elle."