One Shots - Harry Potter

Drarry- I hate you

Draco's P.OV.

I was sitting in the great hall for dinner, pushing around the food in my plate. I wasn't really hungry and really had no point in being there. None of my friends came back for their 8th year, and even if they did, they would ignore me. A lot of things have changed since the war. Hogwarts was fixed up again and all the students who wished to finish their 7th year was allowed back. Although not many came back.

I was the only Slytherin who did, and it was only because the Ministry had said that I had to, and so that I'd be able to can find a job one day, even though that's not going to happen since who would want to hire an ex-death eater.

So finally making up my mind I stood up and left the Great Hall, not before accidentally making eye contact with Potter. He and the rest of his friends came back as well. I stayed out of their way, not wanting to make trouble. We had a mutual agreement to not bother each other. I was fine with that, I didn't want more trouble than what I already have.

I already get pushed around or hexed at least 2 to 3 times a day, so staying on the Golden Trio's good side is something I would rather appreciate. I exited the castle, not feeling like going back to the common room just yet.

I walked towards the black lake and sat down against a tree, just looking out. Thoughts started entering my mind. I tried to push them away, but more thoughts started entering, until my mind was racing and I had an awful headache.I tried taking deep breaths and breathing out, but it didn't work. My heart was racing, as more and more thoughts entered my mind. Some about the war, some about my family, some just about how alone and depressed I was.

That's when I realized I was having a panic attack.

My anxiety had finally kicked in and I could do nothing to stop it. I put my head between my legs and rapped my arms around them, hoping that it would be over soon. My eyes were clenched close, and tears were streaming down them rappidly. It was an awful feeling, I was so vulnerable to the world and if anyone saw me now, the little pride that I'd have left would be gone.

I then heard leaves crunching, it was a bit of a distant away, but still audable. One of my fears were coming true. So I quickly rubbed my eyes and tried getting my breathing to sound normal. My panic attack was at least coming to an end, but I was still anxious.

The crunching of the leaves were closer now, and stopped just a few feet away. I opened my eyes which were still closed and look towards where the sound came from.There stood Potter. Just my luck, the golden boy finding me in the state that I am. I sighed and looked forward again. I didn't want to deal with this, but if I didn't say something if would be incredibly awkward. So I spoke after a small silence.

"What do you want Potter?"

There was no venom in my tone which looked like it surprised him, or from what I could see of the corner of my eye.

"I, uh, just wanted to come clear my head, but I'll go." ... Then I said something without even processing it. "It's fine Potter. Sit." This shocked me just as much as him, but it was too late to take it back, so I moved up offering him some space to sit. He hesitated, but sat down anyways.

It was quiet for a while before he spoke up. "Why did you come out here ?" He said looking forward as well.

"I don't know. I just didn't feel like going back to the common room." He nodded in understanding.

"Where's Granger and Weasel- I mean Weasley?" He looked at me and then back in front of him. "They're in the common room, spending some time together. They said that they could some other time, but I made up an excuse and told them that I had to do something in the library." I was shocked that he just shared that with me,but I nodded and looked forward again.

"Why did you tell me that, out of all people me?" I couldn't help, but ask. He shrugged. "I don't know, I guess you're easy to talk to when you're not spitting insults at someone." He chuckled. "Yeah, I uh apologize for that, I was

young and... stupid." I said rubbing my neck.

"It's fine, we all did some stupid shit back then." I nodded back. I thought that was where it was going to end, but no. "Why did you hate us so much?" I looked towards him then I hung my head.

"I hated Weasley, because my father hated his father and always said mean things about his family, so trying to impress my father, I insulted him, Granger was about the same story, she was muggleborn and my family as you probably know hated muggleborns." he nodded.

"So you also hated me, because you're father was one of Voldemort's most loyal servants." he said raising an eyebrow, but I shook my head.

"No, I hated you for comepletely my own reason. I don't actually think I hated you, if I look back on it I might have been a tiny bit obsessed with you. I'd probably just say something like I was just jealous of you, but I wasn't. Younger me thought so, not that I would have admit it, but I wasn't. I thought you liked the fame, the getting yourself in to trouble, and then being the hero."

"After a while I realized you didn't, fourth year to be exact, and I felt bad for you, but for some reason I still hated you. I thought maybe it was because you rejected my friendship in first year, which may I say, bruised

my ego," he laughed at that, which made me smile. I looked forward again.

"But I was already over it. So why in Merlins name did I still hate you? I still didn't know the answer for years, until last year when you 'died'. It was so obvious yet I still didn't see it. I never hated you, it was something else, something I've never felt before, not even from my own parents, that's why I didn't know what it was." I stopped and took in a deep breath.

Why was I doing this, why am I admitting something that I promised to forget and never tell anyone about. But I was too far in to can stop, so I took in another breath, stoop up and said,

"I never hated you, because the only feeling I ever felt for you.........was love."

I then took off, not even turning back to see his reaction. I was by now sprinting up to the castle. I made it to the common room and luckily there was no one there since it was late. I went to my dorm, locking the door and went in to the bathroom. I splashed my face with water and looked in to the mirror.

Then it finally sank it. I just admitted to Harry Potter, my enemy of 7 years, that I love him. I walked backwards and slid down the wall putting my head in between my legs again and started crying. I was having another panic attack, yet

this time I didn't try stopping it and my head was completely empty....