After awhile of being in the suffocating hospital room, I finally got out of there. Felix drove me home with his car. I apparently lived with him.
Felix was pretty nice and we got along well. When I was still in the hospital, he came every day to keep me company. He told me, that if I was uncomfortable with the idea of me being his boyfriend, we could break up. And we did.
It's not like I was uncomfortable, but the idea of him being my boyfriend just didn't feel right, as I still didn't know almost anything about him.
He was sad. His aura was just so miserable and I could see the despair in his eyes. Him being like this made me honestly hate myself, since it was obvious that I was the reason for his sorrow. I was just a burden.
My bruised limbs still hurt alot, which made doing anything a bit difficult, but it wasn't that bad. Some of the cuts had already turned into scars, while some were still in the process of healing.
I wasn't remembering much from my past, which awoken worry in me.
Right now we were in our shared apartment and making food. Felix was doing most of it though, since I don't even remember how to cook proper meals. Even remembering how to walk was difficult at first, but I had to use crutches anyways.
I was sitting at the dining table, when Felix told me to cut some vegetables.
He handed me the vegetables, a chopping board and a knife. I took the knife and held it in my hand, while staring at it intensly. Sudden flashbacks came rushing in, as I kept my gaze on the sharp and shiny object I held.
It was blurry, but I could clearly see a blade slicing skin open. The blade moved smoothly, cutting open the flesh and veins beneath it. The deep red lines that were created on the skins surface were oddly pretty, as red blood escaped from the fresh wounds.
I blinked a couple of times, feeling a bit confused. Why would I see something like that?
I started thinking about the blood drippind down from the unknown body part in my flashback. Seeing how the skin color was changing from the lack of blood, made me disgusted.
I wanted to puke, feeling a bit sensitive to the sight of blood.
"Is everything okay? You still haven't cut the vegetables."
"I can't."
That was all I said before getting up and going to the bathroom. I opened the toilet seat, vomiting out everything I ate before. I felt grossed out because of the warm liquid rising from my throat, making my body shake as this took alot of energy.
It was hard to stop, since all I could think about was the blood forming onto the surface of skin. My head started to hurt, as I passed out on the bathroom floor.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Song: Eyes Without a Face, by Billy Idol
'I spend so much time
Believing all the lies
To keep the dream alive
Now it makes me sad
It makes me mad at truth
For loving what was you'
YOU ARE READING
lethal//changlix
Fanfiction{completed} "It hurts to know how you wont ever love me the same way you used to. I wont ever get the same Changbin I once knew back, but I know it's not your fault. I try so hard to live with it, but I just can't. I can't anymore." ωεℓcσмε тσ мү ηι...
