Caraphernelia {Frerard}

c h a p t e r e i g h t

Caraphernelia.

So if you're hopeless, we can pick up the pieces and if you're broken, I can carry the pain

Asking Alexandria - Break Down These Walls.

m i k e y

Just thinking about my older brother pissed me off, I didn't understand the motive to what he done and why he carried on going through with it. I didn't know why he would want to leave this all behind. Why would he want to leave Frank and start a new life somewhere where he left and had tried to forget? He said he never wanted to leave here, he said that he never wanted to let go of Frank, he said he never wanted to return home.

He lied to us both.

I understand, there wasn't a lot he had to his name here, he didn't have the best place to call home, he didn't have the most money to support himself, he didn't have to perfect boyfriend by any means. But does any of that actually matter? Frank was perfect for him, that's what makes me want to die. Frank loved him so much, it was incredulous to watch him when he smothered my brother in affection.

I've always wanted that, I've always wanted someone like Frank to cuddle me and kiss me and whisper nonsense into my ear just so he could make me laugh. Sometimes I myself found myself wondering why Frank had chosen Gerard to show all that love for. It was horrible of myself to think, but hey, who the fuck knew I was thinking that way? Honestly speaking, I'm pretty sure that there were other people, not just me, who had the same thought.

Myself, Gerard's friends and friends of Gerard's friends knew he was an absolute dick at times, even to Frank. It was always Frank that calmed Gerard down and made him stop with his attitude, but Frank seemed to be so underrated with all of Gerard's friends because he was quieter than Gerard was. Frank was a really sweet boy and they took advantage of, made fun of him and knew he wouldn't ever say anything back.

I breathed in another breath, noticing I had been waiting outside for another thirty or so minutes, for gerard to call back, probably, before I made my way through the halls, swerving around several people and passed a group of nurses and doctors, turning left and right several times and finding myself at the reception of Frank's ward, walking up to the young, pretty woman behind a computer screen.

She looked up as I approached her, a smile gracing her red lips as she stopped typing to give me her full attention, "Good morning, sir. Is everything okay?" I nodded, flashing a false smile before leaning up against the desk, "Do you think you could tell me anything about Frank Iero? Or get me someone that could tell me something? Anything?"

The woman's smile faded away as she glanced back at the computer screen then back up at me, "Are you a close relative of Frank's?" This was going to stop me from finding things out about him, I shook my head slowly, "No, uh, Frank's my- my boyfriend." If only Gerard heard me right now, he would be going mental, he would punch me and scream at me.

She smiled sympathetically and nodded, pushing herself out of the chair she was sat in, "I'll go and find out something for you, sir." Before she let me say anything in reply or as a thank you, she took long strides in the direction of Frank's room, not looking back at me as she went on a mini investigation for my needs.

I looked down at my hands that were propped up on the desk, listening to different sets of footsteps and looking up at the culprit every time, smiling at them and looking back down when it was not who I wanted it to be, wondering how long it would be before the receptionist would return from her journey.

My phone started vibrating in my pocket, a sigh escaping my lips as I saw it was Gerard that was trying to call me, I accepted his call and pressed the phone to my ear, "What do you want, Gerard?"