Let's Run Away

Chapter 5 - Birds Chirping

I was staring outside the car window in the backseat to avoid the awkwardness clearly no one wanted to address. The image just won't stop haunting me, I feel like I should say something but then again I left shit weird at the damn after I saw that.

"We gotta talk about this"

"There's... uh... nothing to talk about"

"Then why did you run to the car?"

"Because... they were kissing"

"So?"

Seeing Liam and Noah kiss was weird, I grew up with them but I had no idea that they were gay. Liam specifically, I mean he was deadass homophobic, like he hates gay, with passion, well hated. He once broke a guys like just for being gay, I don't like him for it and he does refrain when we're with him. I'm not weirded out because my friends are gay but I'm weirded out because they are gay, they knew about it but didn't even consider tell me that. What the actual fuck, it's like I didn't even know them. I was weirded because they were gay with each other and I wondered where that left me in the friendship.

 Another good thing gone bad which is more shit in my life, and I thought they had my back. "We tried to tell you". It makes sense why they had been quiet on the whole trip, I don't want to talk about it but then I feel like I'm not being supportive. I reached under the front seat to get a bottle of vodka, just to help me swallow my pride and keep my mind free. Emma offered to drive while we talked about this and we stopped the car and changed drivers. I chose to move to front passenger seat, spare the craziness.

 Poured down liquor from the bottle straight to mouth full, I had to drown away the thought of losing my friends to themselves. What a fucken black hole, I feel like a prisoner left alone in a cold cell naked, just freezing. Liam started explaining how nothing made sense to him in his life and his parents tried transferring him to a school in Australia and he would live with his aunt and three cousins, though this has nothing to do with his sexuality.

 After his first kiss with Noah, it gave him a realisation that he had to change his life into whatever he wants to live like. This explains the drugs. I looked back at them, not just any look but the look that says "everything is going to be good", I love my homies and that's not going to change. Noah's excuse was that he doesn't care about this, he didn't feel that he needed to tell me because that would've made "shit" weird and frankly he was right, it is weird.

 Things were tenser now because of the pressure of now knowing that I may have a chance with Emma, maybe. This does explains why they were quiet the whole way. Liam started rolling a joint and I was a little tipsy, the sun was burning bright outside and I wanted to enjoy it a little. I told Emma to pull over and after a bunch of whys, she then eventually pulled over. So much sand, birds chirping and the view of the coastline from far, now we can just get high. We all got out of the car and sat in the car trunk to smoke, this was nice.

 We then decided to open a bottle. Emma reached into her backpack and got out some vodka and some acid tabs. Fuck it I took one first, I needed some psych, something to enjoy and besides there were no parents and I didn't want to stress, plus the playlist became depressing after a while. The drug started kicking in and the birds became silent. We got back in the car and I started driving, I was so high and I was chasing the birds, I just wanted to feel liberated.

We're just PCH, PCH, PCH, PCH, driving

We're the crazy kids, rebel kids, saddened kids,

Wild kids, lonely kids

Gimmie all your kisses baby 'cause this is bliss

Gimmie all your kisses baby

Emma's hands were surfing the wind, the flowing likes wave hypnotising me with such potency, Noah was singing towards the song, pouring his emotions through the words on the stereo, Liam had his head out of the window catching some air and cooling him down. This trip was becoming everything we wanted it to become as it was relaxing and awakening on so many levels. Emma started sharing about herself which was sad but her ending was beautiful.

"My boyfriend broke up with me last week because I embarrass, I have no goals apparently and I got no self-respect".

Emma was smiling while giving this story, this made me feel like she wasn't actually sad about the break up. The stereo stopped, the playlist was over and Liam suddenly started singing with Noah. It was fucken terrible but they looked happy. It was getting late and we were all still way too high. She said something weird out of nowhere.

She said "I'm sure if we made love right now it would be hot".

Fuckthat turned me on, and I tried leaning in for a kiss and as I was leaning inshe moved away and giggled whilst looking outside the window. Like does shewant more or not, that shit was confusing and she left me with a fucken semiboner, but I respect her because the move was baller. As I was driving towardsour next crash pad I looked at the rear mirror, Noah and Liam looked weirdlyhappy touching faces and lips. I was losing some infatuation for Emma andterribly falling in like with her knowing her for a couple of days.

 Emmadecided to play some music and of course, she's a neon girl. One of the mostdepressing genres I can think of, a combination of death, suicide, trap souland waste of tears. She was a good girl with a hood playlist which just madeher even more interesting and honestly how rare is it to fall for a girl foreverything about her with her looks at the bottom of the list. We eventuallygot to the guest house and we were all recovering from a crazy high, my mouthwas dry and I was craving fried chicken and two of each were sharing a room andat that point it was obvious that Liam and Noah were sharing. I was stuck withEmma and I honestly didn't know where we stood in our "thing" and I wasn't surewhat to expect but surely, damn I wanted to kiss her or cuddle or maybe evensmash.