BOMBSHELL...SHAWN MENDES

xxvii. asshole

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It's been a week that Phoebe and Shawn learned that they lost their child. They lost their Joy.

"Shawn, can we talk?" Murmured Phoebe walking towards him.

He backed away. "Talk about what?" He replied. "About the fact that we lost our fucking baby?"

Phoebe gulped. It hurt, it really did. She didn't understand why Shawn wasn't on her side but instead he was against her.

"I thought we could talk..." She told him hoping he would understand that she needed him.

He laughed sadly. "The thing is that I don't want to talk to you. Our baby is gone, Phoebe! The only thing that mattered is gone."

Tears started to fall. "It's not my fault..."

"Who's fault then? Mine? Don't think so." His words hurt more than she thought it would. "I did everything for you while you were pregnant!"

She gasped. "And, I did everything too! Despite the fact that I was pregnant, I took care of you when you were sick. I sticked by your side when you yelled at me because work was stressing! It's not my fucking fault!"

Shawn shook his head. "It is! Everything started when this asshole told you that you were fat..." He said.

The young woman broke down. "Are you really blaming me for this? You're just a fucking asshole."

Shawn was fuming but he didn't seem to understand that they needed each other. If they loved each other, they needed to talk and moved on.

"You lost her, you lost Joy..." He whispered wiping his tears. "You took the only thing that make me happy."

Phoebe gasped at his words. "What if I couldn't have children? What would you do? Leave me?" Shawn didn't answer. "Oh...my god, I can't believe that I fell in love with that." Shawn stayed silent and opened his mouth but she cut him off. "Don't you dare talking! I'm not done. You were so in love with me a month ago, what happened? You were so happy about the fact that I was pregnant." She chocked on her words. "What about me? What about my emotions? You're my boyfriend, the love of my life and we are supposed to be here for each other! You shouldn't be against me."

"Phoebe...I'm way more sadder than you are. I can't eat, sleep or work." He answered without emotions.

Phoebe's eyes widened. "You're fucking unbelievable, Shawn! You're way sadder than me? What the fuck? I was carrying the baby in me, she was in me and she died in me! While I was supposed to give her birth! I was supposed to be her mother and support her no matter what!" She cried hard.

Shawn looked at the floor while Phoebe waited for something from him.

"You're supposed to be here for me." She cried.

"You can't change my mind, it's your fault. Now, I need to go out. I will be back in a few."

And with that Shawn left the room. Phoebe broke down on the floor as she couldn't help but cried.

"You're the definition of an asshole!" She yelled hearing the door close.

She couldn't believe it. What happened to him? Phoebe didn't think a second and went to the kitchen grabbing the only bottle of alcohol and poured her a drink.

That night, she went through all the stages. The one where she hated Shawn, the one where she cried over the baby and her couple, the one where she was dialing random number, she went through a lot and he wasn't there to stop her or to hug her.

Shawn came home around three in the morning, Phoebe still with a bottle of wine hoping she would forget him for only one night but it failed.

"Phoebe?" Shawn asked walking in the dark apartment, only the moon was lighting the roll so he could see her on the floor. "Are you here?"

She scoffed. "So you care now?" She queried still on the floor.

"Of course, I do. You're my girlfriend." He said softly.

Phoebe shook her head. "Not anymore. I'm not yours anymore...You fucked up everything, you crossed the line, Shawn." She hiccuped

Shawn sighed. "I'm sorry, Phoebe."

She let out a dry laugh. "Don't say that you're sorry. Sorry isn't enough, Shawn. You treated me like shit..." She whispered. "I love you, trust me I do but you went too far by saying all those mean things."

"I didn't think...I didn't know you'll end up so hurt." He murmured trying to grab her hand but she pushed him away.

Her eyes closed taking a sip of the bottle. "That's the problem, you didn't know. You didn't know nothing..." She told him. "I just wanted you to be here for me, to hold me and tell me that everything was going to be okay. That you were by my side and you won't leave." She chocked on her words. "But that's what you did, you left."

And everything clicked in Shawn's mind. He was too hurt and too shock to ask her if she was okay. She carried the baby for him, for them and it died in her. Soon, tears were streaming down Shawn's face as he cried silently watching his girlfriend getting drunk.

"Phoebe, I'm truly sorry. Can we just talk and move on?" He queried hoping she would say yes.

"No." She answered.

Shawn watched her as his eyes grew bigger. "No?"

She hummed. "You heard me. We won't move on and we won't talk, we should have done those things earlier but you ended up being a jerk."

He chocked on his cries. "What are we going to do?"

She shrugged. "We will go to your parents tomorrow and we will tell them everything from A to Z. Got it?"

Shawn nodded quietly. "Alright. I'll call her."

"Already did...Before starting to drink of course." She said with a silently giggle.

"I love you, you know that?" Shawn spoke.

She opened her eyes watching the moon. "I know it until today but now I'm not really sure of anything...Especially when it's coming from you."

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Double update!!!!

There are three chapters left before the ending of the 1st part!