True As Cheese

November 21: Don't You Say That

          My arms felt like they'd been microwaved by the time we got the car to the top of the hill. Leonardo's wife had taken his car for the weekend, and Bear's cars are in a garage a half hour away. So, we had to take Michael's car to Bear's garage. Which just happened to be half broken down.

          Bear drove, an annoyed expression on his face as we pulled up to a stoplight. The car screeched as it came to a stop, jerking back and forth slightly. I looked to the backseat, Michael and Leo uncomfortably surrounded by a bunch of junk stored there. The air conditioner blasted but only sent out warm air, making us sweat more. Bear slammed on the gas, sending us all against the ripped leather seats.

"So, I meant to ask before we left, but does your license plate say 'Mafia' on it?" I turn to Michael, my question soon being answered with a devious smile.

"Gotta represent, yunno?" It's as though the universe was against us, as Michael said those words, a cop car appeared behind us. My eyes widen in shock as I look behind us, the car trailing us. Leo turned around, cursing quietly as he pulled out his phone.

"Shit, the feds." Leo begins typing like a god, his thumbs moving so quickly they barely moved at all. Bear cursed and took a sharp right, slipping sunglasses on my face.

"Keep your head down, you're the only one wanted that the cops will recognize," Bear says, taking a left at the end of the street.

"But you're all wanted criminals?" I say, looking frantically through the trash on Michael's floor.

"We had our tech-heads erase our identities. You're now talking to Mark Cream-Supreme." Bear rolls his eyes at the name, a giggle confirming my suspicions on who picked the name.

"My name is still Michael. Except instead of Williams, it's Sparrow!" Michael smiled big as Bear swerved slightly, and to my horror, the cop turned his lights on. I screeched and pushed the trash around, desperate to find a disguise. Bear pulled the car over slowly, the cop following him to the side of the road. I squealed as I found something to help cover my face.

We all went stiff as the cop slowly made his way to Bear's window, enough weapons in the trunk to make a republican squeal. Bear rolled down his window slowly, the cop halting outside.

"License and regi- ma'am why are you wearing a fake mustache?" Officer 'Daniels' looks at me suspiciously, as though he's trying to figure out where he's seen me.

"You sexist pig! Women can have mustaches too! How dare you accuse me of such false accusations. Why I outta call your employer and file a complaint-"

"You look familiar, do I know you?" Shit.

"No, this is Patrick." Stop talking Tessa.

"Patrick?"

"Officer, can I know why you pulled me over?" Bear takes his attention from me, thankfully.

"Your left headlight is busted." Daniels eyes not leaving me. Act natural.

"Sir, this entire car is busted. We're just going up the street to retrieve my car." Leo's arm comes around the seat and turns the fake cigarette I'm pretending to smoke around. I inhale, smoke filling my lungs. I begin to choke, my eyes watering.

"Michael, why the fuck do you have an actual-fake cigarette?!" I scream, throwing it at him.

"Okay so last year, I went to this costume party and brought home this smoki-"