Delirium: Crash & Burn

Part XIX

Harrison 

A couple of weeks had passed and the feeling of euphoria had left, my parents were coming back today. I felt my voice cracking as began to unravel the news to Evie as we sat in Starbucks before school. I tapped my fingers against the wooden counter. The high from the coffee didn't help my nerves, it only agitated them causing me to fidget more than usual.

"My erm, parents, well yeah they are coming home today. Well they should, I mean they should be home after school."

My hands were clammy and they tremored as I spoke. Evie must have noticed as she placed her hand over mine.

"Do you want moral support?"

Her voice was gentle and soft.

"You would do that?"

I was partly surprised and somewhat apprehensive upon receiving her offer to accompany me. She nodded her head slowly, it appeared as though she started thinking about it and the more involved she became in her thoughts, she nodded slower. She cleared her throat dramatically.

"I mean, how bad can it be?"

The question haunted me the rest of the day through first and second period all the way through to lunch. How bad can it be? How bad can my parents be? How bad can the issues be? I didn't know how angry they still were at me, at the situation. My heartbeat increased as I thought of how I would begin to explain to Evie. How I would tell her of mine and Cole's stupidity which costed my sister's life. I feared what she would think of me.

But I wasn't all to blame, Cole had been just as bad as I was but the guilt weighed heaviest on my shoulders, Jade was my sister, not his. I didn't know why I was friends with Cole for all this time. I remember when we banded together at the start of high school, the intimidation Cole had over me. Maybe it was his nature or the way he was born, but he had an arrogance, the type that reeked and would seek to stomp on others whenever he could.

Though Cole wasn't always a bad guy. His personality simply met bad circumstances creating a monster of a person. To top it off we started taking these 'enhancers'. These odd drug type things that were made by mistake. They were more than the usual high.The thought of it was chilling but it made us different, it made Cole different, the drug made him more angry and aggressive.

A monster who I called best friend.

I was brought out of my thoughts as I sat in my car, Evie knocked on the passenger seat window. The loud tapping sound caused me to jump knocking my hand on the horn causing it to blare out. I snapped my head towards the sound and saw Evie who was laughing uncontrollably, I unlocked the door allowing her to come in.

"Oh, so you think that was funny huh?"

My voice dragged mockingly causing Evie to laugh more. The echoing of her laugh filed my car, I couldn't help but start laughing myself. As our laughter died down I managed to steal a glimpse of her from the corner of my eye. I know this was supposed to be a forced relationship, a bet, a fraud, but I could not deny my attraction to her. It was undisputable. Her lips looked soft and full, as she laughed these small dimples appear by the corners of her eyes. As her eyes batted shut my stomach flipped.

I began to drive to my parent's house, the calm atmosphere shifted to a stale agitated one, as I warned Evie about my parents, I explained that my sister had died two years ago. I strategically avoided explaining how Jade died, that was for another day. This evoked a small whimpering apology from Evie, she probably began to think of her own sister. I held her hand in my palm, feeling the warmth of her soft skin as my thumb rubbed the back of her hand.

"It's okay, that was then this is now, it's better now."

I comforted Evie though I was the one who was restless. I spoke those words in attempt to aid my own worries and help myself feel better. I knew my parents hadn't changed, that they were still angry. 

The drive to my house felt short under the looming truth that my parents were home and Evie was going to meet them. Evie had made a car playlist for us which helped me feel some what at ease. But as soon as we approached the gated community my breath hitched in my throat causing me to cough lightly. My palms were hot on the steering wheel so much so that they accumulated sweat between the leather stitching. I suddenly felt like a stranger in my own skin, an imposter.

We pulled into the drive of my parent's house. Their cars were parked slanted over the whole driveway obstructing me. It was their way of signally they had forgotten my existence and didn't want me to park on their drive. I sighed and parked on the curb at the front. My eyes began to sting already feeling the condemnation and weight of Jade's death on my shoulders. Evie summoned me out of my thoughts in her gentle calm voice.

"Hey. It's going to be okay."

She smiled a smile which caused my breath to hitch in my throat and my heart to jump. I nodded suddenly feeling uplifted by her kindness.

A few hours had passed and the four of us now sat in the dining room eating the dinner my mum had ordered. Evie attempted to make conversation despite feeling completely out of place. 

"It's a lovely home you have here, Mr and Mrs Cohen." I squeezed her thigh under the table appreciating her attempt to make the atmosphere lighter. 

"Thank you Evie, but please call me Kate, do you live locally?" 

My mom questioned Evie, she coughed slightly feeling increasingly awkward. I felt Evie's eyes quickly dart to me internally asking me for help. I knew Evie didn't live up here but my parents didn't know that. No one besides me knew Evie's story. I had promised her that I'd keep her secrets. 

"Evie lives outside of town actually, she's from Cali." 

I spoke calmly as my mom's eyes bored into me. She nodded accepting the lies I told. I quickly looked at Evie and I was happy to see she was relieved. The room became quit again, we had all run out of small talk. The silence made my skin crawl, I looked at Evie who's mind had become pre-occupied. My eyes darted between my parents then back at Evie.

The silence was broken as the doorbell rung. My mom sprung to her feet and scurried out of the room to answer the door. No one spoke. My dad's face remained low as he read emails on his work phone. I could hear my mom giggling and talking to someone before closing the door. Their footsteps came closer and closer and the dining room doors swung open.

It was her.

She trailed in behind my mom in her high heels and mini skirt. Her big curly hair bounced as she skipped over to hug my dad who welcomed her with open arms. She smirked as her eyes panned towards me and Evie. Her eyes glinted a hint of mischief as she noticed the confusion on Evie's face.

It was, Poppy.

She rattled around in the cabinet getting a plate and a glass and began to serve herself. She dished out some food and poured herself a glass of wine. She claimed a seat next to Evie, across from me and began to eat. What game are you playing Poppy? I thought to myself. I narrowed my eyes at her as she ate humming and complimenting my mom as though she had cooked. Kiss ass. 

The room was alive in conversation between the three whilst me and Evie sat in silence like strangers. Poppy laughed at my dad's poor attempts at being funny, I couldn't stand this fake display of appreciation. I looked at Evie who was transfixed by Poppy. Evie looked at her admiringly, I saw her sigh silently in what looked like despair. Little did she know that she was worth way more. 

I reached my hand to the back of her head and whispered into her ear. 

"Whats going on in this head of yours girl?" 

She looked up at me and smiled slightly before looking down at her plate. I felt a hint of sadness, I could not help her see that she didn't need to worry about girls like Poppy; that she didn't need to have all of these material things, that she was everything that she didn't think she was. 

Evie was perfect the way she was and she didn't even know it.