strawberries & cigarettes ➸ johayden

XI. feelings

STRAWBERRIES
& CIGARETTES

JOHNNY'S EYES STUNG AS HE opened them to see the morning sunlight shining directly on him through his bedroom window. It seemed to always be bright in the morning after it rained. His eyes hurt more than normal due to his crying the previous night but he ignored the slight discomfort and with a sigh got out of bed to get ready for the dreadful day.

After the seventeen year old got dressed he had went down for breakfast to see that there was none and that his mother and sister weren't up. John saw a note on the table that read "Hey Johnny me and your sister went to the gym early today. Please enjoy whatever breakfast you'd like we'll be back before one" John sighed and sat the note back down on the kitchen table and went to the fridge to find something to eat.

Johnny bit his lip slightly while he looked around the cool refrigerator. After a moment he closed the door and walked to the front of the house grabbing keys to the second family car because he had decided to go out for breakfast rather than eating at home. The cool autumn air filled his lungs as he walked to the car, his hair slightly blew in the wind as well. He started the car and began to pull out of his drive way.

"Hayden" Jessie whispered as she gently shook Hayden's shoulder "Hayden" She repeated a bit louder "Hayden!"

"Hm" Hayden finally answered with sleepy annoyance

"I'm hungry"

"So go eat"

"I want to go out for breakfast please"

With a sigh Hayden sat up in his bed the blankets still on him and his hair extremely messy "Seriously? You want me to get up... and leave the house?"

Jessie nodded and pecked Hayden's check "Let's go" she said happily "Oh and the girls are coming too" She added just before she left the bedroom. Hayden rolled his eyes as he got out of bed to get dressed.

After the two had gotten ready to leave they headed out. Shortly after they arrived at a Ben & Florentine, Jessie's favorite restaurant. "I don't get why we couldn't just eat cereal" Hayden mumbled under his breath as he took the keys out of the ignition and stepped out of the vehicle and Jessie doing the same on the passenger side.

The two walked into the restaurant and Hayden almost immediately saw Johnny, sitting in a seat alone eating and it was as if the sight of John had paralyzed him because he couldn't move and he couldn't speak, he could barely breath, his palms began to sweat as he continued to look at the dirty blonde. After a less than a minute he got pulled out of the trance by Jessie pulling his hand to a table. "So I was thinking since I'm on a diet we could just share your food" Jessie thought aloud as her and Hayden sat in their seats, Hayden still focused on the fact that Johnny Orlando was in the same room as him.

"Hm? O-Oh sure whatever" He quickly answered not paying attention to what she said as the waitress walked up to the table to take their order "Can I get a water please" Hayden immediately asked before the waitress could say a word

"Of course sir. What can I get you Miss?" She responded with a smile

"Water as well"

John saw him walk in but chose to ignore it... after all Hayden did ignore his text. Was it petty? Maybe but Johnny didn't care, he just wanted to eat breakfast peacefully. He could feel Hayden staring but again chose to ignore it as he took a bite of his food.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom" Hayden told his girlfriend as he stood up and left the booth before she could even respond. Once he walked into the restroom he went into a stall and locked it as he pulled his phone out and began to write a text to Johnny but he erased it only to retype it and the cycle repeated until he heard the restroom door open and footsteps walking

"Hayden?"

It was John of course and a flutter like feeling appeared in the pit of Hayden's stomach as he inhaled deeply "W-What?" he stuttered. A gentle knock on the stall in which Hayden was in sounded

"Can you open the door?"

Johnny heard the sound of the lock unlocking and backed up so that Hayden could step out. Once he did Johnny felt an unfamiliar feeling rush over his entire body "What do you want Johnny" Hayden asked with a tired tone

"Um... I uh... I just- It's been awhile"

Hayden looked down at the ground and quickly glanced into John's eyes for just a second before looking back to the ground and ignoring the words he had just heard

"Hayden... Please..." John took his from his side and gently put it on Hayden's "We can't ignore what happened"

"Maybe you can't but I can, okay? I can. I have to go" Hayden harshly said and jerked his hand away from Johnny's as he left the restroom and walked out. He unlocked his car and grabbed his fresh pack of cigarettes that he had gotten a few days prior. As he grabbed the green pack he saw an old strawberry airhead wrapper laying down on the floor of the car and suddenly feelings of love, hate, regret, sadness, happiness and more he couldn't explain went through him and he knew then that he needed to fix everything... but he didn't know how.

STRAWBERRIES
& CIGARETTES