Borahae (BTS reverse harem)✔️

Hold Me Tight

As much as I'd love to stay on the terrace all night gazing up at the stars with Namjoon, he must be exhausted. The other guys have finished with the dishes and have already retired to their rooms. The seven of them had easily put in a 15-hour day. I wouldn't feel right about depriving him of precious, much-needed sleep.

"Can I ask you something?" he asks as he walks me to my bedroom. It's adorable how they treat my room like a separate home that they need to pick me up from and drop me off at.

"Sure."

"You said you didn't have much dating experience. So what made you agree to date seven guys at once? Even move in with them? Unless...maybe you've done this before...?"

I expected him to ask about something more surface, maybe my favorite book or movie, so I don't respond right away, prompting him to backtrack.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry. I shouldn't have..."

"No, no. You're not prying. That's a good question." I collect my thoughts. He said he wanted me to let him in. He wants to be a part of my life just as much as I want to be a part of his. I owe him something.

"Well, I've casually dated before but most times, it never went anywhere past a couple dates."

"Most times?"

He's smart. I can't BS my way out of being truthful.

"I dated someone who I thought I really liked for a while. He lived with me because he had nowhere else to go. And it ended...badly."

"How bad?"

"I, uh, caught him in bed with my best friend."

His eyes go wide. "Whoa."

"Yeah. So I lost two people who I thought I could trust. After that, I felt like I needed to hit the reset button and start fresh. So I answered a job announcement to become an English teacher in South Korea."

His mouth forms an O and he nods slowly, understanding.

"Can I ask you another question?"

"Sure."

"Were you in love with him?"

I blink. I did not expect that. "No," I reply honestly. "Not even close."

"Good."

"Why's that?"

"Because I was wondering if I had to heal your heart before you could open it to me. Glad to know I can skip that step."

Wow. Namjoon is just...wow. No wonder he writes such beautiful, thought-provoking lyrics that the entire world has fallen in love with. To say he's got a way with words is an understatement. In any language, Namjoon could swoon me into oblivion.

However, as soon as the words are out of his mouth, he gets shy. He shakes his head slightly and rubs the back of his neck as if he's mentally scolding himself. I, on the other hand, still haven't uttered a word. How can I follow that? And why would I want to? When opening my heart to him is happening as we speak?

After a few beats, he smiles bashfully and says, "It's late. You should sleep, Violet."

"Yeah. You too...oppa." Somehow I say it without cringing. At least on the outside. Inwardly, I want to dig a hole, jump in and bury myself.

Now it's his turn to be stunned. He opens his mouth. Closes it. Grins at me like I'm the only girl in his world. He can't look at me like that. I'm afraid I'd need to see it every single day. And we only have about 361 of them left.