This is a Safe Place.

Trigger Warning

So I want to share something with you guys...

I was recently told to keep doing what I'm doing (writing this book), there was a time when I couldn't even keep living and I was truly going to end it all.

I was also told that people are actually being helped/comforted and can relate to my words.

This could be triggering and I want you to know that I'm not suicidal right now, nor have I felt that way for a few months.

Here... here lies my suicide note that I never used because I was too much of a wimp... to be honest, part of me is happy and part of me is so mad at myself.

Here goes...

I believe the date of this was around December 2018.

All I have to say is sorry... that's all that's in my brain... that's all I need to say.

There are cruel people in this world but no good people because the heroes always die...

Ian... if you would've just shut up, maybe we could've worked out... you a such a jerk for what you did to me and I hope to God you see this so you know what this feels like... no, I wouldn't wish this on anyone. Actually, you should be happy, you gave me a reason to end my life and leave the world... if you hadn't have come into my life, I wouldn't have known that people like you existed. So thanks, you helped me leave while I could. I want you to know a few things... you have to be a special kind of person to do a terrible thing then blame it on the person you killed... oh, I'm such an attention whore, Ian. You are the scum of the earth and I hate you but part of me loves you for making me do this. You yourself said that people who commit suicide are weak... maybe I am... does it matter now? I will be gone by the time you read this, I hope you read this because I want to thank you.

Madison... now, people like you should burn in hell. I don't want you to see this because there's really nothing to see. All this is is a hate letter but rather than writing "hate" over and over again, I formed sentences. The abuse you put me through I will never forget, the bruises will never heal, the words will never leave my head. There you go... is this what you wanted?

Goodbye to those who care, if any... I love you, I'm sorry... I can't do this anymore.

There you go.