Where She Went

22. Mistakes

Early chapter! (; bet you didn't see this one coming!

For those of you who think Kaleb's a bad word, you haven't got to look into his past very much so back off. He's actually got a different side to him then the one you've been seeing... Be prepared for some feels this chapter(:

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April came back down stairs with a steaming cup of hot tea, and my hands immediately fought the urge to rip it from her grip. She smiled as she saw my curled figure snuggled underneath her sheets and made her way to the bed.

"Here you are." April whispered, handing me the cup. I instantly bring it to my lips and almost groan in bliss as the boiling liquid burns all the way down my throat. She takes it after I finish and sets it on the bedside table.

"How are you this morning?" April asks, sitting on the edge of the bed. I slowly sit up and support myself on the soft pillows below. Everything hurt, every joint and muscle from fighting and running.

"Peachy." I murmur, staring dully into the dark corner of the room.

April sighs and clasps her hands together on her lap, her curls falling over her shoulder slowly as she did it.

"Do you want to take a nice warm shower?" April asks, looking down at me. I slowly meet her gaze and shake my head yes.

"Please."

Taking my hands, she helps me out of bed and leads me back up the stairs. In the bathroom, she helps me strip out of my dress, leaving me bare.

"Oh, Hazel." April furrows her brows and takes me in her arms, making tears form in my eyes again. I felt ashamed of everything.

"Did he hurt you that bad?"

I slowly nodded, and looked down at the ground to will myself not to cry again. As April pulled away, her eyes skimmed briefly over my bruises, which has begun to show even more after resting awhile.

"I'm so sorry." She murmured, gently turning me around to enter the shower. I got in slowly and reached out to pull the lever, remaining silent.

Water tumbled down my back and soaked my hair as April set out a clean white towel next to the shower and departed from the room, closing the door behind her. I turned up the heat all the way until my skin was burning and my bruises were on fire.

Nothing would wash away him. Nothing would remove the marks he left on me.

I close my eyes and put my head completely under the shower head. The constant downpour of water drown out the other noises around me. The faint stir of the a/c, the footsteps of awakened humans outside, the light clank of plates being moved around downstairs. Everything disappeared, and I took the moment to pray.

I prayed that God would forgive me of my selfishness, and my desire to chase after Kaleb. I prayed that November would come to forgive me when he found out, and that I could forgive myself.

But at the moment all I wanted to do was kill myself.

With a shaky hand, I stepped out from under the shower head and grabbed the shampoo bottle. I needed to stop thinking that way, nothing good would come of it.

Rinsing my hair and conditioning it, I finally reach out for the body soap. Tears were probably streaming down my cheeks as I tried to wash away him, but I couldn't tell under the steaming water.

"No." I sobbed, scrubbing harder and harder on my bruises and the love bites on my neck.

They wouldn't come off.