The Bored Book

Laugh A Little

A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. She brought in a variety of lifesavers and said, "Children, I would like you to close your eyes and taste these."

The kids easily identified the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher gave them honey-flavored lifesavers, all of the kids were stumped.

"I'll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It's something your daddy and mommy probably call each other all of the time."

Instantly, one of the kids coughed his onto the floor and shouted,

"Spit 'em out, guys; they're assholes!"
2

A little boy is leaving school at the end of the day. As he strolls along the sidewalk, a car pulls up to the curb, and a man winds down the window.

"Hey, kid, I've got candy in my car. Hop in and I'll give it to you."

"No. I'm not going to." The boy walks on. Further down the road, the car pulls over again.

"Hey there kid, if you get in my car, I'll give you all this candy, and a big bottle of cola. How about it?"

"No way! Now leave me alone!" The boy walks on, quickening his pace. The car again pulls over beside him.

"Look, kid, I've got a puppy at home you'd love to see. Get in and I'll take you there. You can have all the candy and the cola on the way. What d'you say to that?"

The boy is getting agitated. He stops walking, and leans down to the car window.

"Look, I don't care what you promise me Dad. I'm NOT riding in your Lada!"

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Okay i know i haven't been updating as much as used to- and i have no excuse- except i do have a excuse, the whodunit contest is keeping wayyy busy. But i haven't forgotten about this book and will update it as often as i can.

Answer to guess the song: Avicii Wake Me Up.

Scary Riddle for tonight; A man was shot to death while in his car. There were no powder marks on his clothing which indicated that the gunman was outside the car. However, all the windows were up and the doors locked. After a close inspection was made, the only bullet holes discovered were on the man's body. How was he murdered?