The following were actually published.
-Include your children when baking cookies!
-Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
-Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
-British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
-Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.
A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
-Dinner Special --
Turkey $2.35;
Chicken or Beef $2.25;
Children $2.00.
-For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
-For sale: a quilted high chair that can be made into a table, pottie chair, rocking horse, refrigerator, spring coat, size 8 and fur collar
-Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.
-Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.
-Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory
-Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.
-We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
-No matter what your topcoat is made of, this miracle spray will make it really repellent.
-For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.
-Great Dames for sale.
-Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
-Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
-20 dozen bottles of excellent Old Tawny Port, sold to pay for charges, the owner having lost sight of, and bottled by us last year.
-Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
-Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.
-If you think you've seen everything in Paris, visit the Pere Lachasis Cemetery. It boasts such immortals as Moliere, Jean de la Fontain, and Chopin.
-Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.
-The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities.
-Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.
-Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast.
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No Point In Watching What You Eat.
The Japanese eat little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans.
The French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans.
The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans.
The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans.
CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what gets you.
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Answer To Guess The Song: Just Like Fire by Pink.
Answer to Scary Riddle: The police officer suspects the newspaper delivery person. The absence of Tuesday's and Wednesday's newspaper indicates that the delivery person knew there was no one there to read it.
Guess The Song:They say, "Oh my god, I see the way you shine
Take your hand, my dear, and place them both in mine"
You know you stopped me dead while I was passing by
And now I beg to see you dance just one more time
Ooh, I see you, see you, see you every time
And oh my, I, I like your style
You, you make me, make me, make me wanna cry
And now I beg to see you dance just one more time
YOU ARE READING
The Bored Book
Cerita PendekThe Rumblings Of A Wild Erratic Wallflower. Just A Place For Unwarranted Jokes And Uamusing Quizzes. (Does Not Belong To Me) Oh, And Of Course, An Addictive Fix Of Short Stories! ~Roxy
