snow and stars| jon snow

xxvii: pandora's wall

  It was the night of the Honoring and after he had shipped his troops back to Kings Landing when Jon realized what he was going to do, what he had to do.

   He wore hints of Targaryen red, a nice amount of Vela dark blue, and mostly Stark gray as he made his way with Andromeda to the sand, where she would cast the last of her family into the stars, where her brothers could forever be with the rest of them. She already had watery eyes as she walked to the place where she stood every year, this time without a regular partner and with a new one, a man this time. She herself was wearing a Vela's blue, and she was wearing just that.

    She looked to her right, even extended her hand that way, and she she felt no slender fingers, her arm dropped. She was looking for support from a woman who would never be able to do so again, not physically. That made her even worse off that night.

   Jon was to her left and a little behind her and walking with Odda, trailing and keeping a respectful distance. He was aware that his place was purely for her comfort, and that he was no King that night. That night, he was her love and her support system, nothing more and nothing less. The whole of the kingdom was there again, this time much less people. The sight of half of the men, women, and children gone made everything worse. She hadn't been the only one to lose her family, it had been everyone. She couldn't even look at them and their teary faces, some crying both for her and themselves. She turned to the sky, tears flowing freely.

Jon could hardly watch as the light of the stars illuminated her hands, his eyes squinting as they burned bright. He saw her arms fly up in a fit of passion after a long speech that he wasn't mentally present for, and her watched her fingers wiggle in a way that would have been cute under any other circumstance. Next to the flower that she had done for Elara, she placed a lion and an owl, two animals that truly symbolized the twins of House Vela.

He found himself feeling the same way he did two years ago on the same night, breathless, and feeling the strangest need to stay with her. Only, the need wasn't too strange now. Now, he craved to be near her, and it was all too familiar.

§

  Jon was walking back to the chambers he shared with Andromeda when he heard a familiar voice, two familiar voices, speaking in hushed tones that almost did nothing due to the stone castle walls. He quieted his steps as he came closer to the bend, where the two would be standing.

  "I trust her. I do, I really do." Sansa whispered, and Jon could see her body language mentally. He could imagine her swinging her hands about and her brows creasing to form one arch, her eyes worried about something, anything. "But if she fights for the North and I can't, will they see her as more of a fit leader?"

  "Sansa," Arya said, shaking her head. "You need to stop doubting yourself. Everyone has allies, and this one happens to be the best ally we could ever have. And you've never fought before, why does it peak your interest now?"

  "Because." Sansa said softly, because of insecurity rather than privacy. "I have sat out from too many battles, to many wars. I sat inside for the Battle of the Bastards, I stayed holed inside the crypt for the Long Night. Even at Kings Landing, I stayed inside with every other lady of the court."

  "The Kings Landing battle was not yours to fight." Arya spoke truthfully. "At the Battle of the Bastards, you did more than you could've ever done on the field. The Knights of the Vale came because of you, and you saved them all. Way more lives were saved than if you were swinging a sword. And during the Long Night, let's face it. You would have died."

   "I know."

"That's why we put you down there. You are much more use alive than dead."

  "But I want to fight for my people." Jon took his cue to come around the corner, watching Arya immediately come onto the defensive side when she saw a body come around the corner. She loosened up upon seeing it was just their brother.