mamma mia | jeremy jordan

33. reconciliation

"Hey," Ana slid into a booth across from Ashley, her leg already bouncing with nerves.

Ashley sent a genuine smile over the table, a cup of coffee in her hands. "How are you?"

"I'm great, thanks." Ana paused to ask for a water from the waitress. Her throat was dry and closing in. "How about yourself?"

Ashley sighed and adjusted herself in the booth, "I'm okay. I've just been adjusting to life post-divorce."

"Oh, man, that has to be difficult." Anas shoulders sunk in with guilt.

Ashley shrugged, "Yeah, it never really kicked in until I signed the papers and received the notice from my lawyer that the case was closed."

"Well, at least its all over," Anas hands quickly grasped her glass of water when it was set down in front of her. She chugged.

"Ana?" Ashley tilted her head to catch Anas eyes, "Is there something wrong?"

Ana shook her head hastily, "No, nope, nothing wrong at all. Why? Does something seem wrong?"

"You just seem really nervous. Are you sure there's nothing you need to tell me?" Ashley grabbed Anas hand from across the table, a sympathetic expression pointing from her brows.

"Why would you think that?"

"Well," Ashley spike comedically, as if brushing Ana's anxiety under the rug as a way to console her, "you called me way out of the blue. We haven't spoken in a while and I kinda just figured we grew apart and that was that. We weren't that close, so I didn't think it mattered too much. Now, here you are, chugging tap water across from me in a booth. Your leg is visibly bouncing crazily and I can hear your heel hitting the floor. Also, your hands are shaking. What's wrong?"

Ana became too worried of beating around the bush and let the epigraph of novels brewing under her tongue out, "I had sex with Jeremy."

"I'm sorry, what?" Ashley's hand pulled away and she looked shocked.

"Okay, it happened multiple times over a long period of time. Uh, it started as a one night stand and then we were off and on friends with benefits. Then he kinda got scared that you would sue, so he backed off. A few months ago we reconnected and were friends now," Ana explained as best as she could, and Ashley's face contorted to a blank expression.

"Oh, I knew that." She shrugged.

"What?"

"I knew that you guys were a thing. I didn't know the specifics, but I definitely saw him calling you multiple times, texting you at random. One time when I was at his apartment, I saw your bra in his pile of laundry. I didn't realize it was yours at first, but I looked closer and saw your initials, so I pieced it together." Ashley picked up her mug and swirled around it's contents.

Ana's head shook around, her eyes wide, "Wow. How did you not cat fight me?"

"I don't know. I wasn't that angry because we didn't know each other well. And I wasn't jealous because he cheated on me, and I knew that I respected myself more than that, ya know? Like I said, I don't know. The last year has been insane and I'm just glad to be where I am now," Ashley summarized.

"So we're cool?"

"Cooler than ice," she flashed Ana a cheeky grin with a wink of her left eye.

"Good. I've been feeling so guilty over the last year because of all of that," Ana admitted.

"Well I appreciate that you were guilty because it was a sticky situation." She hesitated before adding, "How is he?"

"Really good. He's sober, and he's been sober for nearly six months now. He got cast in a television show, so he's finally employed again. Uh, yeah, he's really good. I can tell that he's been really happy lately and it's just really nice to see that happening for him."

"That's amazing. I'm glad that we're both able to move on."

"Yeah, me, too," Ana leaned back in her booth, a sigh of relief lifting from her shoulders.

Ashley cleared her throat, "I am really happy for him, I hope you know. I hated him for what he did, but I've come to peace with it all. Once upon a time I loved him as my husband, and now I love him for being human. I knew that who he was back then wasn't truly him and I'm glad he figured that out."

There was a moment of silence, coaxed in understanding, as Ana processed the information. "I know he thinks the same."

After awhile, Ashley had to leave for an afternoon appointment she had. She hugged Ana extremely tightly as a goodbye and waved as she stepped off of the curb to cross the street.

Ana waved back through the window of the restaurant, unwilling to go out into the rain. A few minutes after, it cleared up and sunshine broke through the clouds, barely visible from her place in the city, but still there.

She knew it was there.