Darkness

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I have contained depths of darkness

that would terrify the uninitiated

I dare not even plumb the inky depths of my own soul

for fear of breaking my own mind

I am not suicidal

but I have contemplated death in its complexity

and embraced its inevitability

My heart has opened up and bled too many times

My darkness is festering just beneath the surface

barely contained and building

Someday it will overtake me

and I am terrified of the fallout when that happens

I shudder to think of who will go down with me 

when I finally implode

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