As time passes <CHANLIX>

Never

Felix

"Lix I got us a pizza, but don't worry if you're not hungry.."

I didn't respond, I didn't want to talk anymore. I felt like shit and I was still tearing up now and again.

I found this situation odd. I was with Changbin for 1 and half years and I didn't feel like this, but I was with Chan for a little over a month and I feel like my worlds ended.

I must've really lik— I have to be honest with myself. I really loved him...

It never seemed like it, but every time he would touch me or talk to me after we got close I would get butterflies. However because I was scared of getting hurt again I pushed him away.

So I could say it was my fault Chan moved on, I guess I was just delusional to think he actually liked me back. It feels like I've got a million knives stabbing into my chest, it really hurts and I don't want it to hurt. I really hate myself for falling, but you know what they say 'when you fall you either have someone there to catch you or you fall and hurt yourself'. I guess I thought I'd have someone to catch me... I was so stupid to think that.

"Need more tissues?"

Seungmin asked sincerely as he wafted a box of tissues in my face.

I nod and grab the box taking about 7 at a time. I just couldn't stop myself from cry and sobbing.

"Lix I never knew you liked him this much.."

I stop sniffling for a second.

No one knew I liked Chan this much. I didn't even know I loved him until I walked in and saw him snogging Yeji's face off.

I was gradually becoming more comfortable and confident with Chan. I was even considering telling Chan how I felt, but I guess I realised my feeling too late and I guess Chan can't keep it in his pants for too long.

"Can we stop talking about him... I'm not sure if I can think or talk about him right now"

Seungmin nods as he comes to the sofa and cuddles me. He whispers a small sorry and he turns on the T.V.

Chan

Okay so if I take a right here I should see... ah ha! There it is!

Finally I made it to Seungmin's place. Thank god google maps was invented.

All I hope now is that it wasn't Felix... please god tell me it wasn't Felix who walked in. However God if you're really listening, if it was Felix I deserved it...

Gosh here we go...

*ding dong*

Felix

Seungmin has fallen asleep on me awhile ago, so I was felt to watch 'when Harry met Sally' all by myself. Let's just say it made me more upset. Seeing Harry and Sally have their fairytale ending, when will I get mine? Will I ever get mine?

*ding dong*

"Hey Seungmin someone's at the door.."

I nudge and shake Seungmin lightly to wake him up but it didn't work he's like a bear in Hibernation.

"I guess I'll get it then.."

I wiggle myself out from underneath Seungmin. I get up and wrap the blanket around making me feel warm and safe. I never want to let this blanket go.

I get to the door and I'm hesitant on opening it. One because it was 3:00 in the morning and two because it's Seungmin's house and I'm not sure if he wants me to open it.