Furore

30| Grenade.

what the fuck. just read and let me know. honest opinions. just read the previous chapter too.

30| Grenade.

I could feel him breathe, I could see the nerve of his neck pound, I could see his eyes looking at nothing but just me and just me. "Nahi thi mohobbat tab, par aaj hai." ("I didn't love you before, but today I do.")

I lost all control over myself once again and just felt my heart pain, pain like it had never before. "Arsalan mujhe nahi pata tumhe iss sab se kya mil raha hai par aisa nahi karo please..mujhse nahi ho raha hai." ("Arsalan I do not know what you are getting out of all of this but I am unable to drag this anymore.")

"Main bohot khush thi Arsalan, zindgi se tumhare siva kuch aur nahi chachiye tha, sab kuch perfect tha..bhagwan ka itna shukriya bhi kara par..tumne mera dil todh diya." I had tears forming and falling. ("I was really happy Arsalan, I only wanted you from my life, I even thanked God for you but then you broke my heart.")

"Aur aisa todha ki apne dil se he nafrat kar baithi. Lagta tha bus kahin kho jai mera dil." I shut my eyes as more tears trickled down my cheeks as memories rushed to my mind. ("And you broke my heart in such a way that I began to hate my own heart, I just wanted it to get lost somewhere."

"Arsalan mujhe nahi pata ki tumhare liye kitna asaan hai ek pal mohobbat karna aur ek pal nahi..par mujhse nahi hoga. Please mere sath nahi karo aisa." I couldn't help but beg him now. I had no more strength, I had nothing in me, I just felt empty and void. ("Arsalan I do not know how you love me one second and do not love me the other but I can't do it. Please don't do this with me.")

"Asaan nahi hai Sithara." His voice was overwhelmed and vulnerable. I had not heard him be so weak. "Par main kya karun? Hai tumse ab mohobbat." ("It is not easy for me too but what shall I do, I love you know?")

"Arsalan tumhe pata hai nah humare beech ke saare faaslun ki wajah sirf tumhare faislein hain." I reminded him with a heavy chest. ("Arsalan do you even realise that all the distance between us is because you chose it.")

"Malum hai mujhe." He sounded a bit annoyed. "Shayad tum kabhi nahi jaan sakogi how tragic it is to break your own heart and live with it." His eyes gazed at mine. "I did it, I broke myself Sithara when I didn't choose you." ("I know and maybe that is why it is so difficult for me.")

"All years you had me to blame for it, you had me to hate but what about me? I still remember the way you stared into my eyes that day, with so much of love but with so much of sorrow and it shatters me Sithara."

"I know it's my fault, I regret it but what do I do? I realised I could not breathe without you when you left Sithara. Nahi aai samaj mujhe pehle. I realised how much I love you after I had ruined everything Sithara..tumhe nahi andaza main tumhare bina kaise raha hun yeh jaan ke bhi ki tum sirf meri he thi par maine yeh nahi mana." ("You have no clue how I have survived without you knowing you were only mine but I was idiotic enough to not believe it and lose you.")

"I am sorry Sithara but I love you from all my being. I don't know whether you trust me or not." He was holding my hand near his heart and I knew it was beating as fast as mine.

"Sara ishq tumhi se kiya hai..hakikat mein bhi aur khwabun mein bhi." His lips were too dry and thirsty. ("I have only loved you, be it be reality or be it be dreams. It is only you.")

"Sithara tumhe pata hai tum sukoon ho mera.." The sincerity in his eyes and the confidence with which he said it shook me. ("Sithara you know you are my peace.")