Furore

42| Pachtaoge.

42| Pachtaoge.

"Tum kya pagal ho gai ho Madhia?"
(Are you out of your mind Madhia?) The volume, the intensity with which Arsalan yelled tore me apart, it just shook me. I could neither breathe nor move an inch ahead.

"Tumhe mazak lag raha hai sab? Nikah karlun main uss se??" (Are you finding all of this a joke? You want me to marry her?)

"Arsalan.." She was crying too loudly.

"Kya Arsalan? Samaj nahi aati tumhe nahi karna hai mujhe uss se nikah, nahi karna hai." (What Arsalan? Do not you get me? I don't want to marry her.) His words pierced my heart but it should not have, I had come to say no too.

"Arsalan please."

"You think I'm your puppet? First you do not want me to marry her then now you want me to marry her? I do what I want Madhia. You better get this into your head that I'm not marrying any body and don't dare ask me this again."

"Arsalan I know why you are saying this but.."

"No, Madhia. No. You have no fucking clue why I'm saying this."

"Arsalan but Aadya."

"Just shut up okay. Just shut up. I am very much enough for Aadya. I do not know what has made you go bonkers but I'm done now. I'm telling you, stay away from Sithara."

"This is the last time." He turned and his eyes fell on me but he did not care if I was standing at the door, listening to their conversation, he just pushed me aside and walked out too angrily that it scared me.

I had tears in my eyes. All my life I had heard people telling me that Arsalan never truly loved me, that Arsalan was merely captured by my beauty and my brain, that he was only infatuated but today for the first time I felt maybe they were right. I was betrayed when he was sleeping with his wife while promising me his love but his voice saying no to me so evidently, so grossly, so disgusted hurt me more.

I took in a sharp breath, rubbing off the tears on my cheek. "I cannot do this, I don't want to marry him either." I spoke in a jiffy. I wanted to rush home and let my heart rest.

"Sithara." She shrieked. "Stop bringing your egos in between. You both know you two do not mind marrying each other." Madhia was still delusional. It was so clear that the two of us weren't anymore.

He did not want to marry me; he must have forgotten how once he used to tell me that I was the only one he wanted to share his life with, that I was the only one he loved and that I was the only one he was ready to fight the world for or maybe they were just his lies but for me, saying a no to him was different.

I still had him flowing in my heart beats, he was still very much adhered in my mind but I didn't need him as my husband to live with. I could stay away and still love him with hatred.

Moreover, Mumma was right, I could not let Madhia or say anyone decide my future again. I could not get influenced, not after what happened to me last time when I took a decision in haste.

I realised I was too overwhelmed and over-sensitive lately because of every thing happening in a series from the case in the court, to Shashwat getting married, to having Daniya and Arsalan back in my life but I could not continue to be so.