The Suicide Effect | ✓

forty-three

Today is Farlan's seventeenth birthday. He invited me and a couple of his friends from wherever it is that he moved from over for pizza.

Apparently they'd done their research on this place because one of them began to moan at him halfway through watching two of the boys play a violent video game.

"Hey, Far, we miss you back home, man. Why'd your dad have to take that job here?"

Farlan laughed. "Hey - it's not really that bad," he protested, grinning at me.

But the boy wouldn't hear it. "I hear that some girl at your new school committed suicide the other month. It must be pretty bad."

And then there was silence. I guess the guy could tell by the look on Farlan's face and the way that I suddenly paled considerably that he'd said something wrong. Really wrong.

"I think I'm gonna go use your bathroom," I mumbled quietly to Farlan. He nodded in understanding.

I got shakily to my feet and exited the room, closing the door behind me. But I didn't immediately move.

I exhaled hard, leaning against the wall. I could hear Farlan exploding behind the closed door.

"You twat!" he growled. I'd never heard him so angry before.

"What?" came the other voice, clearly defensive. "It was a joke, man, I didn't mean no harm. Can't she take a joke?"

"Not if it's about her dead best friend."

I could literally hear them freeze.

"She... what?" the boy whispered.

"The girl who commmitted suicide was Gayle's best friend," Farlan confirmed.

And then I really did go to the bathroom where I blew my nose and cried through my mascara for a good fifteen minutes.

I left the pizza party a little early with an apology and a hug from Farlan.

It was stupid - but I still wasn't over it.