The Suicide Effect | ✓

thirty-eight

I couldn't stay mad at Farlan forever - I couldn't even do it for more than a day.

I had no shoulder to cry on, no one to text when I woke up at 2am because I'd been dreaming of the whole world finding out my dirty secret. I had no one to tell me that I was okay, that I didn't deserve this - no one was just there for me.

No one cared when Farlan wasn't there.

"Farlan," I said, approaching him cautiously. My voice sounded like thunder - like weak, rolling thunder about to erupt into a rainstorm. I suddenly realised how impossibly futile this would be - Farlan didn't need me. He was surrounded by girls batting their lashes at him - all this time, I'd just been hindering his popularity.

"Gayle," he greeted coolly.

I closed my eyes tightly, every fibre in my body willing myself to utter those words. "I'm sorry," I whispered.

And just like that, he thawed, bringing the wall between us down.

"Me too," he said, wrapping his arms around me.

I could feel the stares of our peers - but I didn't care. Things were okay again.

"Hey, Farlan?"

"Yeah?"

"Let's not do this again," I said.

He nodded in agreement. "Let's not."

I forgot to ask him what he'd meant when he'd gone rogue in our speech.

But it didn't really matter anyway. because I knew that he was wrong.