You Want Me? Beg For Me [Niam]

~Day 3~

Day 3: 11/15/12

Why is this happening to me? After Mrs. Willow had announced the partnerships the bell had rung. I was dying to get away from Liam but he had caught me before I could leave school. He had grabbed my wrist and forced me to look at him.

"Niall we need to work on the paper." he had told me.

I was relieved. I had thought he was going to be angry at me for yelling at him but he wasn't. I think. Maybe he was just waiting for us to be alone so he can attack me.

"We can work on it at my house tomorrow." I had replied. No way am I going to be on his house. I might not be able to leave.

"Sure. Where do you live?"

I told him my address and he promised to be there by 6:30. I was really hoping that the next day would go slowly but no luck.

So here I am, waiting for Liam to get here.

Today at school Liam was kind to me. He didn't bother me only to ask work related questions. I'm worried that he'll try something like try to rape me or something. Ok that's a little far fetched but you get my point. But my mum is here so I'm sure he won't try anything. But what if he drugs me?! Oh my god! What will I do? He'll drag my body through the window and take me away somewhere! Preferably Alaska because I want to see the cute little polar bears and baby seals and-

"Niall! Your friend is here!" mum calls up to me.

Oh shit. I was too busy thinking about baby seals and Alaska that I didn't check the time. 6:32 yup Liam's here. I calm myself before going downstairs, don't want to seem scared or anything that might arise questions. That's the last thing I need. Questions.

I go downstairs in blue sweats, white shirt and barefoot. When I get downstairs I see my mum and Liam in an awkward silence. Super Niall time!

"So...come on Liam let's go to my room." I break the silence.

Liam shoots me a thankful glance while my mum gives me a we'll-talk-about-this-later look. As if.

I lead Liam to my room upstairs closing the door after him. I motion for him to sit on the bed, he does and I sit on my spare rocking chair that I got from my closet. He has a green notebook and pen with him.

"So what are we going to do?" he asks looking at me.

"Well you can start on your part. Jot down times when you've felt sad." I suggest while rocking back and forth.

He nods, opens the notebook to a new page and begins to write. While he's doing that I get a good look at him. No I'm not being a creeper. I'm just...analyzing my enemy.

He's wearing a blue, plaid, button-down shirt, tan chinos, white shoes and his hair is all ruffled up giving it a sexy look. I'm gay leave me alone ok.

I also can't help but wonder what he's writing. What are the times when he's felt sad? For some odd reason the though of Liam being sad makes me angry. I can't bear the thought of him being sad. The thought of him crying about something, his warm brown eyes filled with despair, his lips down in a pout. I just can't-he doesn't deserve to be sad about anything. I just want to get rid of anything that might make him sad, anything or anyone.

Why should I care?

"Niall it's your turn." Liam's British voice pulls me from my thoughts.

I sigh, grab the notebook and flip the page. I want to see what he's written but I don't want to invade his privacy. Wait, we're supposed to get to know each other.

"Hey Liam? Can I see what you've written?" I ask politely.

"Sure." he shrugs looking around my room. "Can I have a look around?" he asks in return.

"Why not." I reply.

I look at his ideas:

• turtle died

• friend had cancer

• found out I was gay(it's all good now)

• Zayn had to move (he then came back)

• got chased with spoons

• being pushed away

Well I guess they're sad times for him. Although the spoons one makes me smile. I'm guessing he's scared of spoons. Cute. Um I mean it's cute like a little kid being scared of the dark.

I begin to write down my ideas:

• fell off tree and got laughed at

• Louis took my food

• had to eat celery

• being rejected

• being called names

• being hurt

• being closed off

• not feeling


"Niall who is this?" Liam asks all of a sudden.

I look up and notice he's holding a picture.

A picture of a black haired guy with a familiar smile in his face. The smile he gave me when he told me he loved me.

Tyler.

I stand up and rip it our of Liam's hands and shove it in my pocket.

He looks at me confused "Was that your ex-boyfriend Tyler?" How does he know that?

I can feel the scars begin to itch as if remembering the person who etched them onto my stomach. I push them away, trying to ignore them.

"Yeah it was." is my only response. My voice comes out weak and I know I'm in trouble.

"Niall you can tell me anything. I'm here for you. I care about you." Liam says his voice full of genuine concern and a hint of affection. I can't take it much longer so I do the only thing possible.

"Liam I think it's time you leave." I say and wince when my voice comes out broken.

"Are you sure?" he asks worried.

"Yeah. Thanks for coming by." I reply. Just please fucking leave already!!

He looks at me for a moment before he grabs his stuff and leaves. I wait until I hear the front door open and close.

I let out a broken sob and let the memories through.

Once the memories begin...they don't stop.


But at least my walls are still up.


I hope.