But He Loves Me~~{Tyrus} COMPLETED

16

•TJ•

I stirred in my sleep, reaching to my side to grab hold of Cyrus but he wasn't there. Only a warm patch was left. I cracked my eyes open slowly, seeing his shaded outline sitting at my window seat. The moon light washed over him delicately, causing this beautiful glow about him. It danced on his shoulders and his hair, softly outlining someone who is already perfect in any light.

"Cy? What time is it?" He continues to look out the window, letting out a shaky breath.
"About four." I got up, moving closer to him. My window seat is only meant for one person, but I sat down anyway and his legs went over mine as we looked at each other.
"Why are you crying?" He smiled a bit, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.
"I was just...thinking. About you." I reached over to grab his hand.
"And that made you cry?" He nodded, letting out a quiet sob.
"I can't do this anymore, Theo. I can't keep doing this with you." I squeezed his hand tightly.
"Doing what with me?" He pulled back, pressing his legs to his chest in attempt to not touch me.
"You really need to leave me. Let me be a loner. I don't want you to wait for me." I noticed that next to him was his muffin hoodie that I took, so I reached over and grabbed it. I held it to my chest, twisting the fabric in between my fingers.
"But I want to wait for you. I'd wait forever for you." He shook his head.
"Stop talking like we're in The Notebook." I chuckled softly.
"Why? Can't I be romantic?" I tried to play, but he wasn't laughing.
"No. You can't. And that's the problem. You want to have a boyfriend, someone who you can kiss and sleep shirtless with and give hickeys to and have sex with. I can't be that for you. It's going to be a very long time until I can be that for anyone." I nodded, looking out the window.
"I get that. Do you think I wouldn't understand that? I'm the one person who has always understood your fear of touch after what happened to you. Incase you forgot, you're the one who decided you were okay with touching me again. Not me." I said calmly, feeling him touch my leg.
"I know. But I don't want you waiting around for me, hoping that one day I'll turn around and kiss you and tell you I'm in love with you." I looked into his eyes.
"But why does a relationship revolve around kissing and sex? Why can't what we do right now be a relationship?"
"Because that isn't how things work and you know that. And I'm not ready for a relationship. I can't trust anyone in that way." I slipped his hoodie over my head, breathing in the scent softly.
"And guess what? I'm going to wait for the day when you are. Even if it's when we are sixty."
"Why do you even want to wait?" God he's clueless sometimes.

"Because Cyrus...I'm in love with you. I have always been in love with you. And you know that. I'm in love with your smile. I'm in love with your laugh. I'm in love with your scent. I'm in love with your voice. I'm in love with your hands, your hair, your clothes, everything. Everything that makes you...I'm in love with it. I want to wait for you because without you there is no point in anything. I love you so much I can barely breathe when you aren't around. So I'll wait for you forever. I'll wait until I die if I have to." Tears fell from Cyrus's eyes, slowly dripping.
"I'm in love with you too. But a huge part of me isn't ready to be in love again, because the last time I felt that close with someone I was broken into pieces until there was almost nothing left." I stood, pulling him up with me. I walked him over to my bed, both of us sitting down. I laid back, him placing himself on top of me.

"I-I'm sorry, Baloo. I'm so sorry." He let out a broken sob but I shushed him softly, running my hands on his back.
"Shhh, hey, it's okay. It's okay." His body shook against my chest as he cried. His hands tightly gripped my t-shirt, wet patches forming from his tears.
"No, no, no. You want a boyfriend and I can't be that for you. I'm so fucking sorry." His cries were practically screams into my torso, my arms around him tightly.
"Hey, honey, hey. It's okay. I'm not upset. Just...go to sleep. Okay? Sleep." He nodded, trying to slow his breath.

*time skip*

"You really love that boy, don't you?" My brother asked, sitting at the end of my bed.
"Yeah, I do. I really do." Grady smiled, beginning to film the conversation. He's been doing that since I was little. Filming me talk about things I love.
"Tell me about him."
"G, stop." We both laughed, but he didn't put the camera down.
"I'm serious. What is so special about Bambi?" I threw a stuffed dog at him.
"Only I get to call him that. And, I don't know, he's just amazing. I mean, even with all the stuff he's been through he was still apologizing to me because he isn't ready to date yet." Grady turned the camera off.
"Yeah, I meant to talk to you about that. Is he the boy that was abused by the quarterback?" I nodded.
"Yeah, he is." Grady smiled.
"So, that's why you went to the court case? You love him?" I shook my head.
"No. I went to the court case to testify. Cyrus has been my best friend for years and I was there throughout the entirety of his relationship with Jonah. You heard him say it, I'm the only person who can touch him. I didn't fall in love with him until last year, but he had started dating Jonah by then. I went to that court case because he's my friend and I care about him." He nodded.
"And now...you're in love with him?"
"Yeah. Madly."

Word Count: 1,057