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I dont matter. Not at all. After inhaling deeply, I try to stop my tears. It helped stop my shaking, but the tears just kept falling. At this point, I just dont care. I accepted my fate a while ago.
My phone sat buzzing by my fingertips. The screen read 'mingi🌹'. I wanted to answer. I wanted to tell him, but he couldnt see or even hear me like this. Hesitantly I still pick up.
"YN? Why havent you picked up?" Mingi asks. "I- I dont want you to hear me like this." I whisper. "Baby whats wrong?" Mingi questions. "I cant do this anymore. I'm sorry. I really wish I could stay here with you, but I cant do it. I love you."
Shakily, I pick up my heavy sleeping medicine. Its meant to put you to sleep when you have a headache. It keeps you asleep for more then 12 hours with one pill. So if I took all of it, I wouldnt wake up.
Mingi was still talking, but I just drowned his words out. I was getting tired, and hot. Mingi hung up. Peace. I laid back and listened to the buzzing of the air conditioner.
It was getting hotter and hotter, so I took off my shirt. Not good enough. I take off my pants next. A thud was on my door. I don't reply. The door opens and Mingi stands in my doorway. "Oh my god YN!" He gasps. "Oh hey." I whisper. I quickly get up, then run to throw up.
When I came back, mingi had the bottle in his hand. I run back to the bathroom and continue throwing up. My body was fighting it. I heard the murmer of Mingi on the phone. My vision was becoming blurry as I was going in and out of conciousness.
Mingi opened my front door and men run in. Sirens buzz in my ear. "YN please stay with me. Fight. I love you so much." Mingis tears dripped onto my face as I was loaded into the ambulance. Mingi was holding my hand and rode with me.
The lights were blurry, I could only make out Mingis red hair. "I love you, stay with me. Please YN. Don't leave me." He crys. "I love you too." I whisper before falling asleep.
