Grizzam (The Society) One-Shots

Almost- Part 3

Sam sat on Grizz's bed, his hand lingering over the bedspread; memories flooding back to him. This is where they shared their first kiss, their first time... It was where Sam lost his virginity, where Grizz had finally succumbed to who he truly was. Sam had to fight back tears sitting alone in Grizz's room, waiting for him to come out of the shower. He recalled laying in Grizz's arms for hours after they had slept together, talking and getting to know each other, and how good it felt to be held by Grizz. Sam wasn't sure how many minutes had passed while he waited for Grizz to finish, but he found himself crying quietly. God, how he wished he could go back to that night, change something, tell Grizz the truth, anything. He mostly just hoped that things could go back to the way they were; but he feared after their argument that nothing ever would. He then felt a hand on his shoulder, causing him to jump.

"Shit- Sorry, I didn't see you come back in-" Sam's words were cut off by Grizz standing there in just a towel, water dripping down his torso and disappearing behind the polyester green towel that hung dangerously low on Grizz's hips

. "I didn't mean to scare you- are you crying?"

Concern flooded throughout Grizz, immediatly sitting beside Sam on his bed and placing a hand on his shoulder. While his heart still ached, the pain had ebbed and was now dull, he wanted to make sure Sam was okay, despite everything that had happened.

Sam wiped away at his tears, "Yeah, I just- this room is where... Well, you know.. Brought back a bunch of memories. I'm fine.." Sam avoided Grizz's gaze, not to mention avoided looking at his exposed body.

Grizz let his hand drift to Sam's back, rubbing soothing circles along his shoulder blades. It made Sam shiver. He missed Grizz's touch, he had almost forgotten what it had felt like. "You're not okay... But I know what you mean. I couldn't sleep in my bed those last few days before I left, too many memories. That sounds ridiculous though, doesn't it? We only had one night together, yet it feels like much more than that, doesn't it?"

Sam nodded, "Yeah, it does." he said in a small voice. "Do you uh, do you want me to leave so you can get dressed?" Sam asked awkwardly, his hands shaking as he signed, from a mixture of overwhelming emotion and a sudden awareness of the vulnerability of their current circumstances.

Grizz let out a small chuckle, "It isn't like you haven't seen me naked before." He commented, making Sam laugh. God, he had missed Sam's laugh. "There you go, there's that smile." Grizz reached out to brush his fingers against Sam's cheek for a moment before retracting his hand. "Sorry.. I'm- I'm not sure what is okay and what isn't okay to do here. I mean, I know we've done things, and we kissed earlier, but I'm not sure what you're comfortable with or what I should be doing..."

"What do you want to do?" Sam signed, afraid his voice would fail him in that moment. Part of him was scared Grizz would end all of this, another part of him couldn't stop staring at a particular drop of water that was cascading down Grizz's neck

. Grizz sighed, "I want to be close to you again, like before. I'm... I feel drawn to you, Sam. Like I've never felt drawn to anyone else before. I'm just- scared."

Sam turned to face Grizz, "I am too, but I promise, no more secrets, I won't hurt you again. I never intended to.. But I understand, I mean, if you want this to end... I never intended to hurt you, Grizz... Fuck, im so sorry..." Sam felt guilt overwhelm him, burying his face in his hands to hide from the world, sometimes he was grateful he couldn't hear, it allowed him to block out reality easier.

Grizz repeated Sam's name over and over, but of course, he couldn't hear him. He wanted nothing more than to comfort him in that moment, though he wasn't sure why. Slowly, Grizz reached out to take Sam's hands away from his face, taking the boy's smaller hands into his own and holding them tightly. When Sam's tear-filled eyes met his, Grizz felt his heart break. "Lets not talk about that right now, okay? I just... Come here." Grizz held his arms open for Sam, sighing in relief when Sam leaned into him, Grizz wrapping his arms around Sam and engulfing him in a large hug.