Blane McDonough- sorry not sorry

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inspired by Pretty in Pink

Do you know when you find that one person who just balances out that empty place that was inside of you? 

No, me neither. 

Those feelings were stupid and not even close to reality, is what I thought before Blane. A day out could transform into a quirky montage with some trendy music over the top without editing. We were living a movie and like every love in every movie, every moment was blissfully innocent. 

Even the not so innocent times. 

Trax beamed above us as we skipped hand in hand into the record store, pretending to care while glancing at different records at opposite sides of the room. I looked up at the tall racks, feeling tiny next to them until I saw the gaps. He walked the other side, pulling stupid faces with that stupid smile of his making me laugh out loud in public. He made those faces just so he could show off my laugh in public it seemed as he constantly tried to make me laugh when we were out together. 

When I was with Blane, which was most times these days, it was like I was a mega virgin with every damn thing and every damn thing we did was like the first time and it was just so amazing and breathtaking. 

When we got bored we moved on and when we moved on we never walked me glided, skipped or ran hand in hand. There was never even a split second when one of us was slightly in front, it would make a person with OCD weep. 

Although we made an effort to try and vary our dates, we rarely went fully out in the public, preferring to laugh and live in peace where there was no one but us and that Blane "don't get distracted from this face" so he reminds me. 

When I was with Blane there was no such thing as sadness or reality or even money, just the things that he showed me and the things that we showed each other. The word bad didn't exist and everything was just peachy.

Even at school, we'd gaze at each other through the gaps in the computers and even the slightest touching of the tip of our toes under the desk was enough to send me blushing and profusely sweating. 

My parents hadn't met him yet but I knew they'd love him. 

My friend's hadn't met him yet but I knew they'd love him. 

Everybody loved Blane including me. We were a perfect dream. 

At night I went to sleep extra early, sometimes when there was still light in the sky just so that the time I could see him next was a closer. When I wasn't even thinking about him, the universe would meddle and give me a call from him telling me to be ready outside in 10 minutes or I'd be kissing his ass goodbye. 

I'd be there waiting without a shadow of a doubt. 

I knew that even if we didn't even get up to anything this time at night that a car ride would be a joyride and a comfortable silence would be tension that needed to be relieved. 

He knew my body better than I did, being able to do things that no boy his age should know and certainly not master. Whenever it got down to that kind of thing with Blane, words couldn't even describe. We'd lay there heaving, breaths getting tangled in the air. He'd look at me and I'd look at him and I knew that life would never feel this way again. 

It's a shame I'm going with Steff. 

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