If I can't be with you

Goodbye

Sophies Point of View

Ross and I broke up a couple of days ago. I felt like shit. I never stopped crying. Today was my last day in LA before I would move back to Minnesota. I couldn't imagine how it would be without Ross. I hadn't seen him the last days. He slept at his parents house the last days while I was moving out my stuff of the house. I would still leave a lot of stuff behind. I couldn't take these memories with me. It would kill me.

I not just lost my dad, I lost the love of my life. But it was my own decision. I needed to go back to my siblings. They needed me. I was so sure of that. And getting them here wouldn't have been the solution. What if I would make them move here and then Ross and I wouldn't work out. I had to stop being selfish and start taking the responsibility.

Breaking up with him was the best for him as well. I hated to see him hurt, but having a long-distance relationship would hurt him more. He needed someone better than me. Someone who wouldn't hold him back. Out there was someone better for him.

The rest of the band and the Lynch familiy helped me as much as they could. They also didn't fully agree with my decision, but they tried to keep their opinions to themselves. Still sometimes they failed. Especially Rydel had her problems with letting me go. She constantly begged me to change my mind. But I couldn't.

Yesterday I found a letter on my bed. It was from Ross. This letter wasn't long. It had a ticket to their show in there and he asked me to come. He just wanted to give me something before I leave. I could see that he cried when he wrote the letter. It just broke me again. I wasn't sure if I should go.

Ross Point of View

Yesterday I was in her room to leave the letter with a ticket to our show tonight. I hoped that she would come. But I was scared that she wouldn't show up. But she needed to come. The last nights I wasn't sleeping. I worked on a song for her. A song she needed to hear to understand what she meant to me. And to be honest a song I hoped would make her change her mind. This song was the most personal song I've ever written.

While I was standing in her room I could see that she already packed a lot of stuff. It felt like she wasn't really living there anymore. But the pictures of all of us where still on her walls. Didn't she want to take them with her? And then I saw a picture of us on her bedside table. I remembered the day that picture was taken, we were at the beach. In that picture I held her bridal style and we were looking at each other with a big smile on our faces. She had her arms wrapped around my neck. I touched that picture just lightly with my finger, stroking over her face. I felt tears coming so I had to leave.

Now I sat backstage and the show had started. Ry was on the stage right now and we would start soon. I hadn't seen her yet and also none of the others had seen her. I really hoped that she would come. She had to hear her song.

The show started and also I wasn't in my best mood we rocked the show. But I scanned the crowd and couldn't see her. We were almost through the whole show and now my song was on. We all ran from the stage to change. "Rik, I can't see her. What if she is not here?" I panicked. "Bro, I'm sure she is out there. Now go out there and sing this song. It is perfect. I hold your back." he reassured me.

There were five stools on the stage and we all walked back to sit down there. I scanned the crowd again and still couldn't see her.

"This song is for a special person, who means the world to me! I wrote this song about her!" I started to play the guitar and Rocky fell in.

I breath you in
and never out.
I lock you in my heart.
Never let you out again.

I carry you with me
deep in my chest.
Would have changed all paths
If I would have known them before.

Now I stand at the shore
The high tide beneath me.
The water to my neck.
Why aren't you here?

I want to love you
Just like the first time.

I want to kiss you
In your open arms.

I want to sleep
sleep next to you.

Be close to you
Before I lose you forever.

Who pays attention to me now?
That I don't get lost?
And when I fall now
Who is catching me now?

In all those streets now
That I don't know about.
There is no one who is waiting
Waiting for me
At home.

I just want to love you
Like the first time.

I want to kiss you
In your open arms.

I want to sleep
Sleep next to you.

Be close to you
Before I lose you forever.

Forever, forever, forever
Lose you.

Forever, forever, forever
Lose you.

I just want to sleep,
sleep next to you.

Be close to you.
Before I lose you forever.

Lose you forever.

During the song I had started to cry. I couldn't hold my tears back. I have lost her forever.

Sophies Point of View

I stand in the back of the crowd. I could see that Ross was putting on a brave face. But I also saw the dark circles under his eyes. He hadn't slept the last days. He scanned the crowd looking for someone. Probably me. But I was in the back where he couldn't see me. It hurted me to see Ross that broken. But I wasn't good for him. He would get over me, I tried to tell myself.

I knew their set so they were almost at the end. The stage was now looking like a night sky. There were thousands of lights shining like stars. They all sat on a stool and Ross started to speak.

"This song is for a special person, who means the world to me! I wrote this song about her!" He started to play the guitar and Rocky fell in. I already had tears in my eyes. This song sounded so good. It was touching. When he started to sing the tears were streaming down my face. It broke my heart. The text said anything he felt for me and I've never felt so loved. And I was destroying this. Tears were also falling from his eyes. What was I doing to him? I couldn't handle this situation anymore. I had to leave.

"I'm sorry Ross! I will always love you! Goodbye!" I mumbled before I left him forever.

A/N

This is the end of the book. Please check out my sequel 'Wanna be your Everything'. 

Please vote and comment.