Something between Us

Chapter 6.

I'm relieved when the rest of the school day is over and I've somehow managed to survive Senior year; even if I barely survive my interaction with Chase.
When I get home from School I try to distract myself from the nerves flooding my body. I lay in my stomach, legs crossed in the air behind me as I re watch videos of today's try outs. We always record every performance so we can look back over and over before coming to any firm decisions. It's the first day of the school year and so much has already happened, my head is spinning.
My only calm is my squad, forever keeping me grounded. I take my pen and note pad from my brown leather bag pack, taking notes of each of the girls auditions.
Hoping I can somehow pick between new recruits from this heavily talented group.

I'm still distracted by the fresh memory of my earlier confrontation with Chase. What happened to us, I ask myself over and over again.
'It was your girlfriend who had a crush on me.' Replays in my mind, 'not the other way around,'  the way his words left his mouth laced with venom hurts. His words sting.
Part of me had always hoped. Part of me deep down had always believed those feelings were reciprocated.
Somewhere deep down I was convincing myself that maybe Chase just wasn't ready to go there. But now knowing the truth our past feels like a lie.
The reality of our past reopens old wounds, I was nothing to the boy who was everything to me. Th emotional scar on my heart once again cut deeply.
It was always a lie and I never wanted to admit it, not out loud at least. But now I have no choice but to do just that.

"I'm going to bed mom, sweet dreams."
I call down the hall as I finish washing up before bed.
"Sweet dreams Ally bear," I smile at the nickname my mom can't seem to accept I have out grown.
My evenings rarely change, between having dinner with my workaholic mom, or dinner alone in my open plan kitchen.
I close my bedroom door behind me, ready to shut out the world for today. When I climb into bed I notice Tate's name flashing on the home screen, 
have you text him yet?' 
'No.' 
Don't be pouty Ally, be the bigger person.'
'No.' 
'The sooner you do, the sooner it's over babe. 
I tame a few moments to think about my reply. '
'Fine.'
That's my girl. Goodnight, love you.' 
I sigh reading his sweet text, wishing I could utter those two words back to him, he deserves it.
'sweet dreams.' Is all I can muster tonight.

I fiddle with my phone in my hands for a short while debating my next move. The 'do I, don't I' internal battle. If I just go to sleep and shut my phone off I can avoid further embarrassment.
I've almost convinced myself I won't call him, but, before I know it I'm leaning to reach the tatty piece of paper resting on my nightstand.
I feel like I've been pacing my room for hours hesitant to make the phone call. It's one conversation Ally. I tell myself, embarrassed at the girl who usually has the confidence of a Queen now reduced to a timid jester. Shaking my head I finally find the courage to press the green call button on my mobile phone.
Chase and I have never been the texting type, if we ever wanted to talk we'd call each other or flash our lights on and off twice to get the others attention; the perks of being neighbours. Just as I realise how weird it is for me to call him and decide to hang up the line opens.
"Hello?" His voice is raspy, sleepy and confused. I gulp; I must have woken him up, I know-knew that voice too well.
"Hello?" He speaks again when I'm silent for a little too long.
"Hey," I finally say something, my voice shaking with nerves.
"Al, hey," I can hear the relief in his voice at the realisation that it's me on the other line, the satisfaction that gives me surprises me.
Maybe he's just glad it's not a crazy stalker.
 "Sorry did I wake you?"
Chase laughs a little light hearted chuckle, "it's two thirty Al, of course you did."
He laughs again no trace of annoyance in his voice.
I gasp at how late it is, how long must I have been pacing for.
"Oh my, I'm so sorry, I must have lost track time," I pause, "I'll let you get back to sleep."
I want the earth to swallow me up right now.
"You don't loose track of time Al, you have a step by step guide to the day."
He's laughing hard now a sound I didn't know I needed to hear today.
"Oh shut up Chase," he's still laughing.
"You're a dick. Goodbye," I bite.
"Hey I'm joking," he quickly jumps in before I can hang up.
I can't seem to catch my breath when he calls me 'Al' some of my friends call me Al but it's never sounded as sweet as it does falling from Chases lips.
"Have you already done your night time routine? Or are you too cheer captain for that now."
I can't help but smile at Chase remembering something so simple about me about our past.
But I also can't ignore the confusion I feel at his sudden change in attitude towards me.
"Fluffy pyjamas, face scrub, a couple chapters of a good book and some corny music."
"You loved my night-time routine," I remind him, sure of myself.
We're both laughing now presumably because like me he's thinking back to the nights we spent in my bedroom, consisting of me convincing Chase to try my latest face scrub.
"Stop picturing me in my fluffy cupcake pyjamas."
"I can't, they were hideous."
Chases' voice is more lively now "although, the avocado set was the worst."
He's laughing again and I can't help but join in.
"I'm surprised you remembered," reality hits me that this isn't my life anymore.
Late night talks with Chase they don't happen these days.
"Of course I remembered Al. Of course."
His voice isn't as strong as it was just moments ago.
"You loved your night-time routines." He insists and the air soon feels a little too heavy for me. "Yeah well," I sigh, "people change Chase."
I don't know where my anger came from the conversation was going so well.
Somehow it just bubbled over the surface, "yeah," he replies flat.
"Anyway," I mentally remind myself who I am and compose myself once again." I just called to tell you that I don't care if you don't want to work with me. We're stuck together now and I won't let your stubborn ass ruin my last year of English Lit," I pause for a moment.
"We will have the best project in class. Okay." I tell him as a matter of fact.
I can hear amusement in Chase's voice, "I bet you already have a colour coded schedule set out for us."
I can tell he's trying to lighten the suddenly turned hostile mood. I appreciate that, so I decide to meet him half way.
"Of course I do," I half laugh, "I'll send you a copy and we can make arrangements to suit us both."
I can't help but smile, despite how long it's been, Chase still knows me to some degree. Maybe better than anyone else ever could.
"I wouldn't expect anything else," it sounds like he's smiling now.
"Sleep well Al," his voice is now thick with sleep.
"Goodnight Chase."