Mia

Chapter 1: Grade12

"I Haaatee youuuuu!" The song "A 100 Ways to Hate" from Five Finger Death Punch started blaring from my phone, rousing me from a deep slumber.

"I hate you, too." I instantly mumbled back to my damn alarm as I sat up to shut it off. I seldom wonder why I even put that song as my alarm in the first place. Oh yeah, I remember why. This was because nothing else could wake me up, so I have always needed something loud and obnoxious to do the job.

I remained in bed for a few minutes until I realized what today was. It's August 8th, and it's the first day of my senior year in high school. I shook my head, attempting to lessen all of the nerves within me, and I got up to gather my clothes for the day. Moments like these frequently happens to me. I become crazy nervous every year because I'll be engaging new teachers and possibly new students too.

However, the one thing I'll dread daily is the popular girls... they have bullied me nearly every day since I could remember. I have several unfortunate things to deal with at home, as well as the neighborhood where I live. It doesn't help that I have to deal with bullies at school, on top of that. I wonder when I'll ever catch a break.

Let me tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Mia Nova, and I'm Lebanese. I'm adopted, and I honestly do not get along with my adoptive parents. They have never made me feel welcome in their home. I have perpetually felt like a stranger, and to make matters worse, they treat me as if I do not exist. I always seem to be an outcast. It never makes me feel stable. It hurts, and it sucks, and I don't have the healthiest way of dealing with the depression it generates within me.

I'll be honest; I cut myself, or, as the literal terminology states, I self-mutilate, and I hide this from everyone. Mainly because I doubt anyone would understand why I do it. When I think about the possibility of the judgment that could follow if people knew, it causes me even more anxiety. It's a never-ending cycle, unfortunately.

I've been self-harming ever since I got kicked out of my biological parent's house. I was eleven, and it was because I made the mistake of informing my parents that I like girls. My birth parents were extremely into the Church and the "Word of God." The day I came out to them, they told me that I was an abomination, a sin and that I was going to hell for the lifestyle I've chosen. That was the first day I cut myself. The next morning, they kicked me out.

I'm open about my sexuality, but I don't make it well-known to everyone, as I am shy and quiet. I tend to be a loner in school until I am around my best friend, Cambria Jones. We don't always have the same classes or lunch periods throughout the semesters, but we find time for each other whenever we can. It's been like this for so many years now, and I wouldn't trade it for the world. She has regularly gone out of her way to protect me when I've gotten bullied, which reminds me of how we met on my first day of Middle School. She's extremely athletic and is the only female player on our school's lacrosse team.

Cambria always knows how to make me smile and feel better no matter what I've gone through. I can safely be myself around her and never have to worry. Well, except for my scars... I've never told her that I cut, and I don't intend to. I am so incredibly fortunate that I have her in my life. I don't know what I would do without her... So, it will be better not to have her find out about it. I cannot lose her, whatsoever. I simply can't.

I glanced over at my watch and realized I've been sitting here longer than I anticipated. Fuck a duck! I'm now running late. I leaped out of bed and dashed to the bathroom. I hastily began to brush my teeth and turned the shower on so the water could warm up before I hopped in.

While I showered, I couldn't help but reminisce about everything I've been through, which had guided me to this very moment. Nevertheless, I recall it all as if it occurred yesterday.