Silent Love

Chapter 7

It wasn't always like this, between me and my father. We used to have a happier life, back when fights were almost unknown of in my family, back when the stress to be perfect didn't exist, back when my mother was alive.

I remember coming home to my mother cooking in the kitchen and my father's car missing. He was always coming home late because of his job, but when he arrived his face lighted up and his mood was visibly better. He used to come in quietly and surprise my mother by hugging her from the back and giving her a kiss on the cheek. In their 20 years of marriage when he used to do that she always got scared. But only seconds later she would smile and throw the "I thought you said you are not going to do that again" phrase. My father always promised but we all knew that he isn't going to keep the promise. Truth be told, I don't think my mother wanted him to stop, I think she liked to be surprised by him.

I always saw true love when I looked at my parents; I knew that they were meant to be together. My father used to treat mom like a queen, like she was the most important person in his life, which was probably true. Mom always said that he was like a second mind attached to hers because he always knew when she needed something and knew exactly what she needed. I have never seen such a powerful connection between two people. He knew her better than anyone.

One time when I was 12 I asked my mother how she met my father. She laughed and said that it was just a beautiful coincidence. Apparently my mother was given to my father when she was 18. She was promised by my grandfather since she was a child, but no one knew except their parents. My mothers father did a horrible mistake which cost my other grandpa a life. His older son died because of that mistake, to make up for it my grandpa asked for another life. My mother's father then swore to give his daughter to his younger son when she is going to be good for marriage. The deal was made and none of the children knew until they were both 18. My mother accepted it as she was used to doing what my grandpa told her, but my father had a girlfriend at the time. He ran away and almost fought grandpa, he hated my mother after he found out why his brother died, he found her guilty too. They never told me what the mistake was.

Eventually, they convinced my father to marry her. In the beginning he was barely speaking to her, treating her like she didnt exist. "Your father always felt guilty for those few years of our marriage. He made himself dumbly stubborn for believing that I was to blame too for his brother's death". I could hear my mother's voice telling me this even now. "He never hit me; he was a good man even when he was acting badly. Don't forget this about your father, my darling Vivien". She always made sure that I didn't misunderstand that part of their life and hate my father for it. She taught me love, only love and happiness.

She was all that really kept us together. My parents' family hated each other, they never made up after the deal, but when my mother was around, they were at peace; it was like that mistake never existed. So was in our house. Everything was kept in balance by her, but that balance broke when we found out that she is sick. I will never be able to forget that day.

At the beginning it appeared like a normal day, a school day. My mother always took me to school since her job was a few blocks away from it. Despite my father's growing business she never wanted to give up on her job, not even when she had me. She made that clear and no one discussed it anymore.

I got prepared and went downstairs to have my breakfast. I remember the dress I wore; it was a yellow simple dress. Who could have known that the exact same dress will end up burning in a bin only a few months later? I found my mother in the kitchen like I always did, the smell could guide anyone towards the kitchen no matter which room they were in before.