Pink {H.S.}

Alternate Ending Two

Please, please read the authors note at the end, it contains very important information.

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I save the file to my laptop before sending a quick email to my publisher, letting him know that the fictitious story had been completed.

                I lean back in my chair wishing to god that that story had been true. If only there existed such a thing as love after love. However in my case, sadly, it didn’t exist, Fate had been a bitch to me.

                I’m startled by a noise at the door to the living room.  I whirl around in my chair to see my sixteen year old son Jase standing there. I had had some truth in my story, or Jase was an attractive boy, there was no denying that. He had grown up just like I had said in the book; with his mother’s eyes and hair colour.

                God how I missed Amanda. It had been so many years since she had been with us, and I was bored of it. It never felt right to be with another woman. Never. I guess that’s why I had decided to write my newest story about me finding love again. If only Delilah had existed.

                “Dad, I’m going to go out with some friends. Have you- have you taken your medication yet?” he swallows hard, toying with the strings of his hoodie. I only nod in answer. I had been on the medication or severe grief since a year after Amanda died.

“Good. I’ll be at the park a few streets over. Call if you need anything.” I nod again as he walks away, hearing the front door closing moments later. I stood up from my chair, stretching my back and taking a glance out the window.

                The sky was dark and dreary, a foreboding shade of grey. It looked as if it was going to rain soon, but what else was old news? It was always raining in England. The sky was a reflection of what my moods been like since the day Amanda passed away.

                This wasn’t the first time that Jase had left the house with no particular reason other than to hang out with friends. He was out of the house more than he was in it, and I couldn’t blame him. This house was a mess, just like me.

                I had been a terrible father to Jase, and the worst part was that I realized this as it was happening, however couldn’t force myself to be a better parent. It was as if when Amanda died, the part of me that cared did too.  I couldn’t even look at him most days without my heart hurting, he was a spitting image of her.

                Don’t get me wrong, Amanda’s passing didn’t make me love Jase any less, not by any means. It just made me not have the ability to give him a better life. I had written a few books in this span of time, all of them being fairly successful. Jase had gone to a private pre-school as well as private primary and middle schools. He was currently in his senior year at an elite high school, and I could tell that he couldn’t wait to get out of here.

                I had heard him on the phone a few times, talking to his not-so-secret girlfriend. It seemed like most people knew other than me, as his friends had dropped comments in passing the few times they came over here rather than Jase going to their house.

He talked to her most night, mostly about how excited he was to get out of here and go to university with her. He said that he couldn’t wait to get away from here, and to start a life with her. I felt like shouting at him that love was a joke, that it never lasted forever. That Fate always came and screwed it up, whether by death, one person falling out of love, or even just shitty timing.  Love doesn’t last.

                But of course, I kept these thoughts to myself. He was still young, he still had time to learn and grow, and if that meant having his heart broken, or breaking a few hearts, then so be it. I just hoped he recovered from it better than I did.

                I think that’s why I wrote this story, about a girl loving me, and me loving her back. A story that shows loving after the one you love leave is possible, that Fate isn’t always a bitch, that second chances are possible. The worst part was that this story was fictitious, and nothing I could ever do would change that. Delilah was my one and only, and I’ll never love again, nor will I find someone to love me back.

                Maybe it would be possible for other people, to love even after death. Maybe I couldn’t recover because Amanda was taken from me at such a young age, and left our son. Or maybe it was because I was never good with break-ups, or saying goodbye. Maybe it was a mixture of all these things, plus bad timing and an in-ability to love again. Mostly, I think it was because despite it being years after her tragedy, I was still uncontrollably, undeniably, deeply in love with Amanda.

                But who’s to say which it the reason, when the reason was unknown to everyone, even myself. I didn’t know why, but all I knew was that I was destined to roam this world alone for the rest of my life forever, never finding love again.

This was my ending, and I didn’t know how to handle it

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A/N: Holy hell, my baby is finally finished. I’ll try not to get too emotional here, but I make no promises about my acknowledgements.

I’ll be going back, editing, adding pictures/videos, and giving out dedications for the previous chapters. So if I see you voting for a bunch of chapters, or commenting a lot, or if you ever pm me to talk to me, not only can you get a dedication, but you can get a place in my acknowledgments as well.

This will be my final One Direction Fanfiction, however I am planning to start multiple 5 Seconds Of Sumer ones soon, so if you’re interested in them than you can read them, the first will be coming out in little while after this book is finished for good.