Despondent Beauty [Ereri/Riren Fanfic] [COMPLETED]

Chapter XXI

AN: POV switch to Eren.

I sat in the hot spring for more than two hours and I noticed it was getting late, however I didn't want to go back inside. I didn't want to face Levi for a while because if I did I'm more than certain he'll try to talk me into initiating war between my people and his. I knew that it would be upon us and that it was inescapable but I didn't think I was strong enough to lead my people just as my father had. I wanted to be stronger than him so I could show that I wasn't weak or someone who needed protecting every time. I wanted my people to see that and that became my reason for acting so tough and why I train day and night to strengthen myself.

As I sat in the hot spring trying to sort out my mind of the many thoughts swirling in there, the peacock that Levi brought back came up to me and sat on the same rock it did when Levi first showed it to me. For some reason it hadn't died from the air here on this planet as I understood that it was a bit too thin for the humans, however it didn't affect the bird. I let the thought vanish as I had too many thoughts already and decided to try and distract myself from them by petting the bird before me.

" You sure are as colourful as us, I'll give you that, and super soft too." I wore a small smile when I felt the bird's soft feathers under my fingertips.

" So are you, Eren."

I turned to face the direction of the voice from behind me and immediately regret doing so as my eyes landed on Levi.

" I'm surprised you're still out here when it's this late."

" And I'm surprised it took you a while to get here."

" I got lost as soon as you left my sight." I watched as Levi scratched the back of his neck as if he were a bit embarrassed.

I turned back around to face the bird I was petting as it had now jumped onto my knees to be even closer to me. I held my gaze on the bird as I started to pet it again.

" You going to try and coax me into starting the war?" I asked sarcastically.

" No. I know you wouldn't like me telling you to do it anyway, so I won't."

" Well you sure did give up easily."

" I haven't." He spoke sternly which caused me to turn back around to face him. " I'm trying to save you from the hate that you've created for yourself."

" What exactly does that mean?"

" Exactly what I said. You doubt yourself too much when it comes to being the king your people deserve and because of that you compare yourself to your father of whom you see as the greatest Tao in Tao history."

" Because he's exactly that. How can anyone surpass a great leader like him? My people expect me to be just like him only because I'm his son, but I'll never be as good as him."

I stopped there as what I said about myself only hurt me more than it should have. For years I've been told by everyone of how great a Tao my father was and I've dreamt of the day that I could be like him or greater, but that childish dream has been slowly degrading as I grew up. I'm afraid of being king, I'm afraid of leading my people in fear that I might kill my own, I'm afraid that I might not be able to protect those I cherish the most. These fears and anxieties seemed to be what pull me down and I know this to be true yet I continue to dig the hole I've dug even deeper.

Those thoughts ceased when I met Levi, though.

" I get what it's like to be afraid of not being able to fulfill people's expectations, trust me. Being the son of the commander's sister brought on a lot of expectations onto me, and I never could be what the others wanted me to be. But you know what? I'm my own person and I'm proud of it. I can make my own choices, be free, but with it comes one thing. You have to make sure you make the choice you won't regret the most."

Something about those words sparked the diminishing fire inside of me back to life. All my life I've been wanting someone who would tell me what Levi was telling me right now, I've wanted someone who would look at me as an equal, as someone you'd meet randomly on the street and have a pleasant conversation with, as someone who would look past the fact that I'm royalty. Levi gave me all of that and he was never afraid to tell his honest opinion on things.

" Levi?" I started. " Do you think we'll have a chance against the Sky Beasts with the help of your friends?" I asked, finally making my decision.

I must have taken Levi aback with my question but he answered.

" I believe so, and if not I've finally come to terms with a decision I've been debating for awhile now."

" And that would be what?"

" Letting you kill my uncle."

I stared at him with surprise and disbelief. He was allowing me to go through in killing the man who murdered my father. I needed to know why he allowed me to do this.

" I know you're wondering why I'd let you after saying I'd stop you if you tried, but I think he's beyond help now. I think he's grieving over my mother still to this day and he's taking his frustration out on the Taos. If that's the case then I can only do him the favor of putting him out of his misery. With his death comes a new commander."

" And who will that be?"

" The friend I was talking with earlier. He looked after my mother for a time before making the ranks, and now he's earned himself second in command. Meaning if my uncle dies he's next in line to command. With his leadership, any tensions surrounding us and the Taos will fade as his mind set is aiming for peace."

With these solid words of confirmation I relaxed and thought it over, clenching my hands into fists. I looked at my reflection in the water before looking back to Levi, this time wearing a confident smile and determination bubbling in my eyes.

" Alright. If he's bringing havoc to us, we'll return the party favor but with a surprise."

Levi smirked and came up to me, embracing me tightly. I returned it and as I did I could feel all my worries, fears, and anxieties being pulled away from me. I laid a kiss on his neck as a thank you but apparently doing so flipped a switch.

" If you do that I'll have to do this-!"

Before Levi could do anything I pulled him into the hot spring with me. When he came up for air he splashed me and I splashed back. This continued for some time before we wound up nestled together in my room after twenty minutes of horsing around in the hot spring.

AN: Here's chapter twenty-one! Things are finally getting heated up for a battle, so buckle up and hang on for dear life cuz this plane is about to make an emergency landing. I hope you liked this chapter and I'll see you in the next one!!!

¥•~To Be Continued~•¥