constellations [DISCONTINUED]

centaurus

"Hi Gilbert."

"Um... I... I read your letter."

"Oh, you did. S-so quickly huh?"

Gilbert came a step closer and I jumped a little in surprise. He smiled. "I liked it a lot."

"I-I-I'm very um... very happy abou-about that."

"But..."

"Hold up there's a but?"

"I really wanted to hear an apology from your pretty mouth."

"An apology from what now?" That sentence was sufficient to make Blythe himself blush.

"I said that I want to hear an apology from you. That's what I said."

'That is exactly why I wrote a fucking letter' I though. I probably rolled my eyes, which made him laugh.

"What's the issue, princess?"

"Nothing! I will say your apology."

"Go ahead."

I breathed in deeply, trying to think of some kind words that I could spit out easily.

"What's wrong, Anne?"

"Nothing! Nothing. I... I will say... something."

"Your hair looks pretty, by the way. I like what you did with the flowers."

Gilbert — again — took a step closer and put his hands in front of my eyes.

"What—" I tried taking them off "Gilbert, what in holy hell are you doing."

"You don't have to look at me, it'll be easier for you" He inhaled sharply, like he was breathing in ten thousand needles and they were all pinning through his neck and chest and whispered "maybe not so much for me."

"Gilbert why—"

"Anne, just do it!" He laughed, I could not only hear it, softly it flowed into my ears like warm chocolate would in my mouth, but I could also feel it with his hands. I think it actually helped, I couldn't see him, so I could the words just rolled out of my tongue.

"Gilbert, I'm sorry I was so mean to you. I'm sorry I firstly looked at you angry in english, then interrupted you, then called you slateface and finally basically treated you like you didn't matter and selfishly required apologies and explanations from you, when clearly that was not about me. Sorry for being rude to you all day and for topping it off with the cheapest form of insults I could've ever thought — with no reason, whatsoever. I feel so terrible that I made this all about me, I think I was just bitter you left without saying goodbye and then never spoke to me again."

I said that last sentence so quickly I just hoped he didn't hear that. I couldn't believe how honest I was, the eyes closed thing really made me forget for a second that it was Gilbert who I was talking to. He took his hands off of my eyes and the light showed in prismas, the light revealed the most dim little freckles I had never noticed on him. They were as drops of an early morning coffee that dripped on his nose and slightly splashed on some bits of his cheeks. The sun, the beautiful sun also flirted with his eyes. It made the green on them glimmer and it swirled and mixed the honey with the light, the colors dancing on every layer of his iris.

"Anne that was... That was amazing."

"Was it though?"

"Your apology was fantastic. Even better than the letter. Which I liked, by the way, even though I could do it better."

"No you couldn't."

"Yes I could. Anyway, thank you carrots, I loved it. Listen, I..."

"See you, Blythe!"

"Wait, Anne let me..."

"I said see you, Blythe."

I couldn't handle it anymore. First, I went to his house to deliver an apology letter and a cookie, then had to wait and he didn't show up, then I had to leave, found that he was running after meand lastly he made me apologize to him face to face. It was too much, I just couldn't.

I ran off go Green Gables, when I arrived there I just banged in the ranch door and shouted a quick 'Hi' to Marilla when I got inside, running to my room.

I turned the bath on and let the water run while I undid my braids, untangling the strands of hair and putting the flowers on top of my bed.

Your hair looks pretty, by the way. I like what you did with the flowers.

I started taking my clothes off, first the pants. Oh, my legs were so skinny, tremendously pale, I turned away from the mirror. I took off my top, not looking at my reflection but running my hands through my shoulders, knowing the thousands orange freckles embedded in there.

I walked to the bathroom, in front of the mirror without hinting at it and taking off my makeup. I wasn't looking, but wipe by wipe, smudge by smudge I felt the makeup smearing away from my cheeks, naturally the freckles were showing.

You don't have to.

Gilbert's words hunted me and immediately made me look to the mirror. All of them were there, all the little seeds, the orange paint, the rust, all of them were there, slapped onto my cheeks, nose, chin, forehead... all of it.

I took the wipe and removed the gloss and lipliner carefully, first bottom and then top lip. My mouth which before tasted like artificial strawberry and mild generic makeup taste, now felt a bit like rubbing alcohol and cotton swabs.

I really wanted to hear an apology from your pretty mouth.

What was he even saying? Didn't matter. I moved on to my eyelashes and the mascara came off messier than any of the other products, leaving smudges everywhere. I ran two wipes over both of my eyes and it just reminded me of his hands leaving my eyes and my pupils meeting him and the sun.

Got in the bath, turned off the faucet and just sunk there, remembering nice days by the sea and getting lovely soapy water to block my ears and clear my head.

this was SO annoying, i had written such a nice 400 words but my wifi was off so i LOST it. it's okay though, I managed to remember quite a lot of it.

this was a longer chapter but I loved it sm, it was amazing to write, hope you like it as much as i did.