Evermore (Vampire Knight fanfiction.)

41 - Beautiful Little Fool.

Resha Valentine.

It has been three torturing days. I can't help but hurting myself even more. Like when Kaname whispered something to Yuuki and she blushed wildly.

I get it, I know that secret since the very long time, I was the first one he told about that. But what I can't stop is the jealousy. I'm looking at the blushing Yuuki with a smile, I know that choose to do nothing is wrong, letting her living her life without a past, but if the past come back... Kaname is...

Love makes us selfish indeed. I shouldn't ask for more. We had our moments. That was enough.

*******

Now, I don't talk to Kaname at all, but I know he's waiting for me to start a topic because his eyes frequently meet mine intensely. Is there any better way to live an eternity without wanting someone that's destinied to be with another person?

His destiny is not with me, mother.

"Resha, you and Kaname seem really quiet these days. Is there anything bothe—" Ichijou stop talking when the chalkboard and the walls behind him destroyed, caused by me and Kaname. "Guys! It went through the wall!"

I'm smiling as an apology, "sorry, can't control it these days." I choose to leave his question hanging. Aido and others asked me about those blood scent they smelt, but Kaname simply said don't worry... They sure as hell figured what happened, and they knew it's serious because me and Kaname rarely fight. Kaname is also very emotionless, nothing painted on his perfect face. Nothing. As if the fact that me and him will get separated for eternity doesn't bother him at all.

The thought of me being the only one who value our relationship is sickening. "I don't feel well, I'll excuse myself for a while, Dorm Leader." I stood up abruptly and walked away, with eyes burning on my back.

**********

I was from the library, and been looking for Chairman, just simply looking for someone to talk. He's a really fun person, actually. Have some similarities with my Father except he's a little more childish. Heh, Lucas Valentine... I always thought of my Father... Lucas is a real gentleman I've always wanted, and he's kind. He was never mad at my mother, but they're always arguing. Evelyn is more of a childish one, but mature and tough somehow.

"I'm madly in love with mother, Resha. Don't tell her that."

They have different perceptions, and I remember very well when they argued about what kind of weapon I should use later, and end up their argument who caused several heavy wind outside the manor then with a kiss. Ended up gave me their powers as my weapon.

I'm walking smiling just remembering about them, and I'm hearing whispers. Someone's talking in the hallway. I thought it's Yuuki and Zero, but as I listen closely, it is Yuuki and Kaname, so I hide suddenly.

I'm just a few feet from them, hearing it clearly in my ears.

"Even if I'm stupid, I understand... No matter how hard I try, I would never match with Kaname-senpai... Kaname-senpai... About my vanished past, you're connected to it, right?"

The past? She's eager to know it? Why would she? I mean, I know it's hard for her to live without it, but I just... I'd trade my place with her. Living without being a vampire, without being like this... Living with killing other people is disgusting.

I'd be her if I can. Start my life all over.

"You are the girl... Who could give me warmth... I've always been afraid if you knew the truth, you would come to hate me..." Kaname's voice is begging and sad, I creased my eyebrows in a moment when he said that. What a word.