How do you feel when your life is basically falling apart?... It's like you're slipping slowly... You don't feel anything... You just feel empty... How should you feel?... I act happy and like nothing is wrong, but truly there are a million things... The one person I would talk to?... I can't say anything to... Well I could but I would never get a response... There are so many things I want to admit to but... I could only tell bits and pieces to certain people... I can't tell my family anything because that would ruin everything... How the fuck do you even make sense of it all?... I'm so tempted to just go to a friend and say everything... Maybe then they'll help me in ways you did too... The pain hurts in ways... I wanna say I'm used to it, but this?... It's a new pain... It's like a hole that can never be filled... It's endless... One thing after another... Leaves you wondering what could possibly be next... Leaves you on the edge of your seat hoping and praying nothing happens to you again... Because what if you loose it all?... Could you handle that again?... There's so many what ifs... There is so much going on and I can't handle it... I wanna be better... I wanna be happy... But... I just can't... Every time I feel okay?... It all falls apart... So really, how are you supposed to feel?...
