Phantom's Fate 《Phantom of the Opera Fanfiction》

15

A/N: First week back to college is over! I'm sorry updates are generally really late at night, but it's the only time I can breathe and preview before publishing. Sorry about any inconveniences!

Enjoy ♡

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Struggling to find my voice, I stare widely at Madame Giry as she inquisitively gazes back. Her eyes make my mouth go dry. "Oh! I'm sorry, I-I was just stopping by to see if you were here, and the lights being off made me think otherwise, so I decided just to wait..."

Shit. I'm rambling. And she looks unamused.

"Have you come to a decision?"

My heart somersaults in my chest. "Um, yes, I have." Swallowing, I suppress my urge to spill lies and back out of this opportunity. My father would be disappointed. Meg and Ivan would be disappointed. Erik would be disappointed. I just cannot let them down. "I have decided...to try again."

Madame Giry's eyes shift from cold to a warmly surprised chocolate brown. "You have? I am delighted to hear."

My jaw tight, I fiddle with my hands, clasping them together. "When did you plan on beginning practice?"

"Why, I have a free moment now for the next hour or two, if you prefer."

Now?! Am I physically prepared to start so soon? Am I even mentally prepared? Feeling a sweat start to drip, I force a smile, "now works. I just need slippers."

Why did I just say that?

Her hand reveals a ring of keys. "I have plenty in my office here. Come in, and I shall size you for fresh ones."

°▪︎°▪︎°

《Erik》

"Now, we shall go over basic positions to start..."

I watch leisurely from my box as Madame Giry instructs Alia privately to begin. She does perfectly as her legs form the positions, and her arms arch in the various appropriate heights. She must remember it easily from all the years of practice. Her aura, however, does not seem nearly as calm like her posture. The is a look of distance falling over her face. Is she as lost in thought as I am from what occurred before? I must say, it has been on my mind persistently...

I could be mistaken, but I am almost certain of the fact that Alia meant to...kiss me earlier. Yes, she had given me one on the cheek, but somewhere in my mind, I believe she originally meant it for my...lips. However, the entire time travelling up here and waiting for the two women to begin rehearsing, it has been flooding my mind. Why did she decide on my cheek instead? Could it be...she was disgusted by my lips? The thought arises a sharp pain in my chest. Devastating, it may be, but also a viable explanation. Why else would she have eluded them?

Part of me hopes it to have just been my breath, or that I was simply too tall for her to reach. Unfortunately, with a face like mine, those innocent reasons would not be the case. Maybe some horrid thought crossed her mind of kissing a murderer. Or tainting her lips because of a monster who drives everyone away eventually. Maybe she was sparing me...but of what? Of a possible opportunity for pure bliss? For happiness? Companionship?

Merde! Am I really attempting to blame her for this? I truly am a despicable beast. She could have some simple explanation for such an act, yet I am overthinking every possible reason for her not to kiss me. Did I even want her to follow through with it?

Who am I kidding?

Of course I did.

I just am unsure of the consequences if she did. Tainting her lips, she may end up dying for all I can guess! Maybe that's why my own mother turned her face in disgust at my request for my birthday. But...how I yearned for Alia to kiss me straight on the mouth. The amount of joy it would have brought me would surely have caused my death! But I must refrain from thinking such lewd thoughts. She is, after all, a beautiful young woman, and I, an aging man. A corrupt man, nonetheless. I cannot taint her pure lips with the touch of my own. I must not confront my secret longing for her to be in my arms, or to whisper sweet nothings while gazing into my eyes tenderly.