So, Here I Am

Chapter Fourteen The Truth - A.J.

He just stared at her, incredulous.  He always knew he was adopted, and Maggie had given him the photo when he asked for it.   There were no secrets between them of any consequence.

Maggie " You realise I only just found this out !  I had no idea, of course I had no idea !" she was shouting now.    A.J. just sat on the bench with his mouth agape.

" I .....I......Oh, my God !! "

Maggie sat with him on the bench again, both of them just staring at the water, the traffic on the river, not registering anything.   And yet the world was still revolving around them.   How was it possible.

Maggie "You've always known what your mum looks like"

"You're my mum !"

"You know what I mean.  I mean, can you .....have you ......processed any of this yet ?"

"I like Larry, I don't like Laurent" was the first thing out of his mouth.  Then he sat upright, panic in his voice

"Oh my god, shit, mum, you and Laurent ! Fuck, mumma, you and Laurent !! "

-- Me and Laurent.   Me and your brother.  Me and my adopted sons biological brother. -- She felt sick again, rushed towards the railings, and threw up over them into the river.

A.J. "This is fucked up." he said, matter-of-fact-ly.

Maggie "If we'd never met them it wouldn't be. But we have, and yes, they are, and yes, it is a little fucked up"

A.J. "And we have to tell them, don't we ?"

"Yes, we do".   What he said next took her completely by surprise.

" We have to do it tonight, the sooner the better. I knew half this story at least, they are going to be devastated, aren't they ?   Rather they hear it from a friendly face than from an enemy".

"Oh, sweetie, we have to be careful.  Like you say, they're going to be devastated.   Mama obviously didn't tell them who the baby, you, was.   Should we leave it to her ?  Tell them they have to go back to Paris for a heart to heart with mama ?  No, they'd want to know. And I couldn't deal with it for that long.  But telling them is going to be impossible too !"

Maggie is crying hard again.   Crying at the thought of having to inflict this kind of pain on them. She'll be telling them their mama has lied to them, by omission, all their lives.  That they have a brother, that their twin dynamic will be different now, it won't be just the two of them anymore. -- Shit !! --

But she will also tell them, as kindly and as lovingly as she can, that their mama did all this for them, to keep them safe.   So they could have a better life without their abusive father around. And, oh my God, what about Laurent, would he be sick to his stomach too, when he thought about he and Maggie ?   Having a relationship with his biological brothers adoptive mother ?

Her heart was shattered now, for all of them.   --  How the hell is this happening ?!  --   Maggie then took out her own phone, and looked at a photo that even A.J. didn't know she had.

It could have been the same photo, only the woman holding the baby was Maggie.  Same room, same furniture, same date, same time, same baby.   One woman with joy in her eyes, but pain in her heart.  The other woman unfathomably sad, holding her newborn son for the last time.

She looked A.J. in the eyes now, and showed him the photo.

"I took that picture, and she took this one."

She could feel her heart literally break into a thousand pieces.