The Light that Shines Within

Steve's Lessons in Life, Love, andbthe Puersuit of Youtube

Steve POV

I heard a gentle knock on my door and I just knew it had to be Cassandra, who had come to give me lessons for the event known as POKE? No... PAX. Yes, that was it. The event where she went to every year to see her friend from school and for vacation. And if things went smoothly enough and I showed her I could be cool, maybe she wouldn't be so awkward around me. Perhaps she would start to like me back? And then there was Loki to deal with... Why did he even have to come along with us? He was going to be a challenge to keep an eye on for sure while watching her too. Not that she needed me watching her... or me watching her at all. That wasn't what I meant... Oh, sweet flag of mine...

I got up and went to the door after checking my hair in the mirror and smoothing out the few stray hairs I saw and taking a deep breath. I opened the door to find a very guarded woman with a smile plastered on her pale beautiful face. Someone clearly made her very, very upset. I smiled nervously and looked at her as I moved out of the doorway. 

"Please, come in," I said evenly and Cass nodded once with the stiff nod she gave during a mission. It was like she felt teaching e about PAX was only a mission in her eyes. And I wasn't liking it much. "Thanks, Steve," she said, entering my room and sitting at the small table I used for eating. Not the bed like she usually did when she visited me in my room. "So, let's get to it, shall we?" Cass said, pulling out her tablet from her purse and turning the screen on. Whatever got to her, I really didn't like it. Not one bit. 

I sat slowly in the chair across from her and gave her space she clearly wanted. My eyes searching her features cautiously. Her eyes were stormy, conflicted with some inner emotion, her posture stiff and defensive. Like she was afraid to relax around me. I wanted to say something to her, to reach over and run my fingers over her hand's back to make her relax but thought better of it. I reluctantly decided to give her the chance to explain to me what was wrong with her. 

I nodded cautiously and looked at the screen before me. On it was a video of a guy in glasses and red hair. He was playing that scary game where the children's toys at the pizzeria come alive to kill you as a nightguard. I was terrible at it so far but this guy made it look so easy. Made a super-soldier look like a super wimp at video games. 

At least she smiled a couple times during his screaming and panicked yelling. 

"This is Markiplier. One of the four reasons I love YouTube and why I go to PAX every year since his channel was made in 2012 and playing Abduction, yelling at Mr. Mooseman..." She smiled wider in remembrance and her face relaxed as she looked into space, then back to me blushing in embarrassment at drifting into her thoughts so easily. I smiled a little seeing it. "No, please go on, Cass, if it helps me see what's so important to you about this place. I want you to show and tell me everything that makes you happy. So please, continue." 

She smiled at me and continued her tale. 

"Okay, so I was just released from the ice they had me in and I was feeling pretty low... things were not the greatest in my head and well... there were times when I wanted to see sweet oblivion..." Her voice trailed away and she looked away from me, ashamed of what she had said. My heart panged in hurting for her fragile state back then. Cass had gone through a lot to get to this point and I admired her all the more for it. If anyone understood that suffering, it was me. The shock of finding out you have been sleeping for so long... that everything and everyone you knew was gone...

I got her... In more ways than I'd care to mention.

"Cass, look at me. Please?" I asked slowly once I regained my cool. Her face was one of scared defeat. As if me seeing her this way was the ultimate defeat in battle or a disgrace of some sort. My stomach turned over in knots seeing her like this and I couldn't take it anymore. I just couldn't sit there letting her ache and be at war with herself. I had to do something about it and so I did. In one swift movement, I took her hand and pulled her to me in a hug, keeping her close. She gasped and relaxed reluctantly after a minute in my arms and I smiled, feeling it. She was beginning to trust me... Stroking her hair softly, I spoke quietly, "It's okay to talk to me about it. Of all people, I should know what it's like. Please feel free to be honest with me, Cassandra... All I want is to help you, be here when you need me and hope you can trust me enough to help you. Okay?"

Minutes passed and I felt her nod slowly. "S...sure, Steve... I will next time." She lifted her head off of me and blushed, looking down and going back to her chair. In the end, she just swiped on another video fast to get rid of the awkwardness. "Hmm, this is Jackesepticeye. He's another of my favorite Youtubers." I smiled and watched the video onscreen. This time there was a green-haired guy on and was yelling at a bicycle driver in an Irish accent. I had to admit it was pretty funny. "He's Mark's friend and they sometimes go on tour together with their other friends. Tyler, Ethan, Wade..." She smiled and glanced up at me.

"These guys have actually helped me through a whole lot since then. I can laugh on days when I want to cry. They make me smile when all I do is look in a mirror and hate myself for what I am today. I feel accepted in a world where I know I'm a freak of nature. So few of us are left..." she sighed, looking at the tablet again and smiling. "Cass, I never think of you as a freak of nature, or want you to feel strange and left out." She nodded and smiled at me, all traces of earlier anger gone and I internal breathed a sigh of relief. "Thanks, Steve. You're pretty cool for a senior citizen," she added slyly and I feined hurt. "Why young lady, you need some lessons in manners to your elders. And I don't mean from your uncle either." She laughed, throwing her head back and her beautiful black hair swept behind her in gentle waves. As if what I had just said made her day.

I loved that feeling. 

"Wow. Okay, Lone Ranger, let's finish your education. I'm hankering for a cup of Joe." We then did a crash course on all her favorite things. Bendy, FNAF, Film Theory, Fortnite, Undertake and Everything Wrong With... so much and it was hard to process. But she was happier the more she talked about it. And that's what mattered to me. 

Next stop, POX-I mean, uh... PAX.

Yeah, that.