The Light that Shines Within

The Museum pt. 2

We walked into the exhibit and were instantly pulled into the crowds of people there to look at stuff from the SSR. Steve kept a hand in mine as we strolled, starting at the same capsule that had transformed him. From the scrawny kid from Brooklyn, to the american hero he was today. I looked at his face and saw that look I knew all too well. The look of memories taking you back to a place you rather not be again. I squeezed his hand and leaned into his shoulder for comfort as he gazed at the machine with that lost face. 

"It only hurt a bit..."

I looked up at him. "Yeah?" He nodded and squeezed my hand gently, glancing at me with a sad smile. "Erskien was a good man and did all he could to make it painless as possible.. And he succeeded, for the most part. I only felt excruciating pain for about ten seconds, after that it was barely there and I could feel the serum course through me, solidifying my muscles and making me taller." He chuckled to himself as he remembered something.

"I really had to use the bathroom. And I should have used it before the opperation. "

 I laughed at that one. Steve could always turn something like that into a funny memory. He grinned at me and for a minute, the bad memories were forgotten. I made sure to tease him as we passed the next bathroom and that sent us into another laugh fit. We saw some old Stark Tech stuff, the submarine from the Hydra agent that Steve stopped from getting away with the last vial of serum, and we watched an old Captain America film about war bonds and what they do for the country. It was silly seeing Steve back in the day and I loved to see him happy among all these old memories of the War. I felt like maybe this would be ok...

Until Peggy began to talk.

It was just after the war ended, and they were interviewing Peggy Carter, founder of SHIELD and Steve's first love. He still had her picture right now in his pocket. And I instantly felt his mood change again, from happy, to sad and remorseful as he gazed up at her in the small theater. She too looked sad, probably not yet over the loss of her captain and there were tears in her eyes as she explained why they were ending the search efforts for Steve. "It is in the best confidence that we decided to end our searches for Steve, I mean, Captain Rogers. "

She seemed so sad...

and my heart went out to her, trying to be brave and keep a calm face when I saw that sadness in her eyes. "He was a good friend to all who knew him, even to the point of where he may have jumped off a train to save someone he cared about. He fought bravely on the battlefield and rescued countless lives in his service. He may be lost, but never far from our hearts and minds. In this way, he's never truly gone. Thank you..." The video ended and the narrator began I quick summary of the search that did find Steve later and I took his hand again. He was in his thoughts again and I felt terrible for him. "S..Steve....let's go..." I said quietly. He seemed to slowly come back to reality, looking at me with a tear going down his cheek. My heart ached seeing that, reaching over and wiping the tear from his cheek and taking his hand in mine once more.

I wished we had never come here.

"Steve..." I said quietly. "I know its hard. I know how hard it is to look back at the people, at the places we loved before. I am so sorry that she's gone, that you are clearly still in love with her, that we had to come here and that I had to see you cry. " He looked at me through the glasses and sat still, listening to me. "Steve Rogers, I know all too well of what this is like, how it is to find yourself years from where you began..this is hard,so hard and I want you to know I'm right here for you. I'm here to help you on these days when it all seems hopeless and scary. When you finally think you were better off frozen forever, then suffering in a time you don't belong. I'm so sorry and hope you know I'm here for you. Ok? Please feel better....cause you'll never be alone....I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere..ever. I promice you that.."

He nodded and took a deep breath. 

"C...Cass....thank you....so.much..." He said quietly, leaning in for a hug, me pulling him close and holding him there. We sat there for however long in silence. Just feeling like we were each other's life preservor. "Steve...we should go....I think we both deserve ice cream after all this sadness, yes? Let's get this behind us please?" He nodded and let us get up, holding hands again as we left the museum. Getting ice cream at a place not too far from the exhibit.

We both ordered chocolate. 

Soon he was happier, talking about the days after he became Captain America. "The Comandos thought it would be funny take all the toilet paper and stamp Hydra logos on the roll. So we were litteraly wiping our butts with Hydra. " We laughed and I ate another spoon full of ice cream, happy that the good vibes were back and gotta say. That was actually really funny to do. "Wow, just wow. " I said shaking my head. "You guys sounded like these guys who worked on my papa's farm. They were always doing little things like that." He nodded. "These guys sounded like pretty all right workers. " I smiled. "They were. Things were pretty great until my sister died. Having to sell the farm and everyone leaving."

He looked down.

"That doesn't sound too good. "

"It was my fault Steve. I hadn't had a handle on my newfound ..existance yet. And I ..well...I killed her." Steve blinked at me, then took my hand and giving it a squeeze. "It wasn't your fault. You were still getting used to your powers and those were given to you by force. Your sister's death was not on you." He gave my hand another squeeze and looked at me with a half smile. "If it helps any, when I first got my powers, I was ripping off doors that normally I had to pull hard on. It was embarrassing and mortifying. But look Cass..if you think your a monster, your not. If you are, then I am. Then Bruce, Tony, Natasha, Clint and all the Avengers are monsters." 

He looked right into my eyes.

"You are no monster Cassandra Smith. Your a kind, funny, loving woman who would do anything for those she cares about. You have worked tirelessly to change the name of your species to one of caring and protectiveness. You may have done some bad things, but does not make you a bad person. Trust me when I say this, ok?" I looked at him and smiled a bit. He really had a way with words. "Thanks Steve, I needed that."

"Anytime Cass."

We left and we started on our way home. We really had a good time, it just had its sad moments and we got closer together I think. Steve wasn't mad about me being a vampire, about my whole strange existance. He cared, he really cared and I couldn't be happier about it. And approaching the Tower was a different story because no sooner than the elevator had dropped us off on the bedroom floor my loving uncle Tony decided to shine a bright flashlight on us like we were criminals. "So kids, have fun? " Tony grinned and winked. Instantly setting off my annoyance meters and making me roll my eyes. "Yes, it was fun. No, we didnt make out or do anything else than hold hands." I held up our joined hands as proof. " Now, if you don't excuse me..." I looked at Steve and kissed his cheek. " Thanks Steve, I really had a fun time tonight." I glared at my uncle and went to bed. Having to worry about going to the airport tommorow.

Yay...