My Story.

I love how you love me.

Coco and I had a furious argument because she hung up on Joe. Yet again I stormed out of the hotel. As I walked around I found myself thinking about the last few years and humming a song. "I love how you love me."

I realised I was in love with Kerry. My conversation with Joe and my fight with Corinne were on repeat in my head. I had mistakenly told Corinne that Joe had thought Kerry was in love with me. She howled with laughter initially. Then the tirade of derogatory comments started. She reminded me that I was old enough to be Kerry's father and not particularly attractive anymore. That Kerry was probably shagging Joe or one of his friends. How she was surprised that Iman had even agreed to meet me after that fateful dinner party. God how I wish I hadn't agreed to go.

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I was the only single guy there and she was the only single woman under the age of 55. I circulated among them. The couples were bickering so that was uncomfortable. The older women were discussing hot flushes and vaginal dryness. So I had only her to talk to. The conversation was fairly awkward. At some point in the evening the wine glass I was holding broke in my hand. A few slithers of glass got stuck in my palm. While everyone else was stressing about it she calmly retrieved a magnifying compact mirror and a pair of tweezers from he bag. She removed the slithers, put them in her own palm said she was going to dispose of them. She reappeared 20 minutes later with a fresh glass of wine for me and a plaster on her thumb.

"You cut yourself too?"

"Hmm. Oh it's nothing Dahling. Just a little nick off the glass I pulled out of your hand. Here Dahling. drink this. It's a special wine i brought with me."

I drank it at first out of politeness. After about 15 minutes I started to feel a bit strange. She got up from where we were sitting. I suddenly started to panic at the thought of her being away from me. It was like I couldn't breathe when she wasn't next to me. I didn't understand why. I hadn't been particularly enthralled by her conversation. Yet here I was now trying to convince her to meet up with me. Every time I tried to stop myself from asking her I would hear her say my name and then find myself almost begging.

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Anyway back to Kerry. I had been having dreams about Kerry from right from when she was a baby. At first it was a fatherly feeling towards the silent child I comforted after she was abused. When she was 13 things had gotten awkward. She was 'maturing' but there was something wrong, something dark within her eyes. I had taken a break while I was filming labyrinth. I had nodded off. I opened my eyes to find myself in her room. There were posters of Duran Duran on the wall. I touched her shoulder to alert her of my presence. She jumped a mile. But quickly scrambled into my arms when she realised it was me. I rocked her while she sobbed uncontrollably. Then it happened. As I rocked her she looked up at me. She whispered

"I love you Mr Angel."

I kissed top of her head, her forehead then the tip of her nose. As I whispered that I loved her too she reached up and kissed me. Not just a peck on the lips kiss either. She also slid her hand down to my crotch. I panicked. Had I given her reason to think that I wanted her sexually? Had I sent out the wrong signals?

She saw the panic in my eyes and something in her changed again. Before I got a chance to explain I was shaken awake by a crew member. That was the last time I had visited her astrally for a long time. I had tried to visit her but I would always end up outside her door unable to enter the room. I could always hear her crying. Almost 4 years went by before I started to see her again and I hadn't recognised the beautiful angel in my dreams as being the little girl that I had comforted so many times before.