"Live for me. Please."
Sometimes it's hard to abide the promise you made. The life of 17-year old Emma gets excruciating when her beloved two years younger brother Cay gets hit by a car. Her life makes no sense, she can't accept the absence of her c...
I took a last look in the mirror to look at myself. I looked awful, but the reason for that was that I didn't care about it anymore.
It almost seemed like I turned into a different person. I was one when Cay was alive, and now I was just someone else. A brokenhearted seventeen year old girl, who in a matter of two hours lost everything she had.
Before, I used to hate black colour. But now I didn't dress into any other. My world was black, so was my mind and heart.
My parents had decided that they would take me to school by car. They seemed to be terrified that I could get hurt too. They wouldn't survive it if I got hit by a car as well.
They seemed to be everywhere where I went. I started to feel like a prisoner who has to be looked after.
No one spoke a word in the car, our minds were too overflowed by the fact that there were only three of us and not four anymore.
When we got closer to my school, I felt like running back home and never come back. I didn't want to go there without Cay, all of the memories will be chasing me there, that was for sure.
Before I could ask my mum to let me go back home, dad parked the car in front of the school.
The first thing I noticed was a big black banner that was hung above the entrance door. My eyes welled up with tears, my breathing was getting erratic.
I saw the tears glistening in my mom's eyes when she spotted it. She tried to smile at me, but she failed. She said. "Have a good day, Emma."
I only nodded and whispered under my breath. "That's going to be pretty difficult without Cay."
I was delaying the moment that I had to get out of the car, but that wasn't possible forever. With taking one last deep breath, I opened the door and got out of the car.
As soon as I stepped out of the car, I could practically feel all those looks being fixed at me. People were turning around just to see me, all of them had tragic faces. I heard them whispering things like: "It's hard for her. That is a tragedy." Or "She looks like she hadn't slept over the past week."
I wanted to answer them that I really didn't sleep a wink, that they are being tactless when they say things like this, but in that moment my bottom lip started to shake.
My gaze fell to the place where lots of lit candles glowed. I walked over there, almost like a ghost.
It was a memorial for my brother. His photo was hung on the entrance door and there were dozens of candles lit all around it. The tears finally poured out of my eyes when I saw all the love there.
I looked at the photo and started shaking even more. He looked so happy in the photo, his smile shining brighter than all stars in the universe.
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He always used to smile like that. It hit me right in the face, the painful feeling that crept in my heart everytime when I realized that he was not alive anymore.
