Reckless

What is love?

Chapter 3

She felt the weight of the world being washed off her skin as she lingered in the rain longer than she had to outside of Bellamy's tent. She thanked god for no injuries and a quiet camp. She assumed that their people didn't think they needed to get out of bed when Bellamy had made a point of walking outside of his tent for fifteen minutes before retreating back into the almost-waterproof shelter. She stepped in, turning around to close the tent at the bottom with a bobby pin and her hair tie. She wasn't going to have a damn person walking in on them again- that was for sure.
Clarke moved over to Bellamy, positioning herself so she was straddling him and her mouth had uninterrupted access to his. He made a sound when her wet clothes met his chest, "God, you're soaking wet."
"I know." She said seductively- triggering his signature smirk. A small laugh escaped his lips while she pulled off her jacket, letting it hit the floor. He stood, picking her up with him and lightly placing her beneath him. His lips attacked her neck, his hands were in the process of removing any and all clothing off of her. He brought her shirt over her head, maintaining fierce eye contact, and let it fall down next to her jacket with a soggy sound. She didn't realize how cold she was before his hot breath hit her cleavage. She giggled as she pushed his head down against her which caused him to laugh.
"Patience." He teased, "We're taking this slow because we have all day..."
"Or we can make this a multiple time thing." She suggested because she needed him.
"It's going to be a multiple time thing anyway, sweetheart." His eyes flickered, "Over and over and over again I'm going to make you...let go." He nearly moaned into her ear. She didn't know how to respond to that. She knew he was completely capable of doing it though- which excited her and scared her at the same time.
Clarke held her breath while he tugged at her pants. Her hand fell into her hair while she thought about the upcoming events. She cursed herself for not realizing how beautiful he was before this. Normally, she would result to the more masculine word- handsome. But, there was something truly beautiful about him that couldn't be described using the word handsome. Maybe it was his caramel colored skin or his earthy eyes that made him beautiful- but those were average descriptions of most people. It had to be his jaw, the way it clenched when he was pissed off and unclenched when Octavia did something so foolish that he was temporarily shocked into some other veneer. Or it could very well be his lips- the dark pinkish color that enhanced his every word because they were so mesmerizingly gorgeous... the slight trace of hair growth because he couldn't shave that close with what they had lying around might also play into his beauty. Damn, it could also be the freckles- there must at least eighty freckles on his face but Clarke had never taken the time to count them. She concluded that all these things made him physically beautiful. Yet, she found him intoxicatingly emotionally beautiful too.
Because he cared and hid it from the world like it was his private secret and no one could know that he had a heart...unless it was about Octavia. Clarke loved how Bellamy loved Octavia—only because she'd never seen love like that. In all actuality, the only love she'd really ever seen was between her parents and look how that ended. Her mom got her dad floated and sent Clarke to jail. In all actuality, Clarke didn't have the faintest idea what love was- not really. And Bellamy with his resting jackass face and cruel words and rough hands knew undoubtedly what real love was...
She envied him for knowing the beauty of love. She wanted to know what real love felt like- not love that last for moments or love that is temporary- not love that can be cheated on or has to be shared. She wanted to know what real love meant. She wanted to know why people desperately tried to find it whether it was because of religion or emotional contact... she wanted to know why men went into battle for women besides the scientific answer- testosterone. She wanted to know the highs and lows of it all. She wanted to feel something besides constant betrayal, anger and sexual satisfaction. Sometimes, she felt so hallow because she lacked what most experienced.
She wanted a flutter.
These were her thoughts while Bellamy kissed down her and rubbed his hand along her leg. "You with me?" He asked her after he noticed there was no reaction from her.
"Yeah." She said as he brought her back to reality. "I was just thinking."
"About?" He asked, sitting beside her until she gave him a sign that she was ready to continue.
"Talking really isn't part of the agreement." She said, her eyes dodging his. Her voice had grown cold with the realization that these nights were only temporary fillings for her hallowed out heart. She could succumb to the warmness of his touch, she could moan his name and promise him a thousand times that she was his... and he could say he was hers when they were caught up in the moment but she didn't know how truthful they were being with each other.
He didn't back down. He wanted her to talk even if she was going to say that she didn't want to do this anymore. "Forget the agreement for a minute and talk to me. What is wrong?"
"I'm going to be eighteen soon and I barely have a grasp on reality."
"What the hell are you talking about? You're all about the reality of this planet, Clarke..."
"I don't know anything about love." She said.
Bellamy leaned back against his pillow beside her, "Love isn't part of reality, Clarke. It's on a completely different level." He turned on his side to look at her better. "Why the sudden thought of love? You falling for me Griffin?"
"In your dreams." Bellamy's mind drifted back to his dream he had the night before. In his dream, she was definitely in love with him. She, on the other hand, was referring to his dreams from the night before last. "I'm not falling for you, but I would like to fall for someone."
"Someone...hmm? Your choices are pretty slim. I'm sure Jasper-"
"Don't even go there." Clarke's hand meant to push at his face but instead her hand stuck to his skin unwilling to move. Her fingers lightly traced over his cheek bone while he closed his eyes and moved into her touch. "Does it ever scare you that this could all be gone in an instant?"
"I wouldn't let it happen in an instant." Bellamy informed her. "I don't think you would either."
"So a slow and painful end- you want to put that in the agreement?" She cracked a small smile.
"Certainly do. Its how we'll test the worthiness of the person you're trying to leave me for." Bellamy was smiling too against her hand. He kissed her palm before placing her hand on her lap. "Of course, I don't think he could ever do it the way I do it."
"Who said I'll leave you for a guy?"
Bellamy looked at her with squinted eyes, "You're a tease, Clarke. A real fucking tease."
"Now why would you ever say that?" Clarke said, tangling her fingers in his curls. He groaned when she yanked.
"That's why." He told her, "Because you are this girl who knows how to get the right reaction out of me when you want it without much practice and it's completely annoying and exhilarating at the same time." She mounted him, her bare legs on either side of his exposed abdomen. His hand fell upon her calf while she leaned down and kissed him gingerly. Her lips parted and their passion shifted away from conversation. His hand relocated to the small of her back, his fingers pressing into her skin when her lips moved from his to his neck. She used her tongue to kiss at spots on his neck, then down his chest. He looked down at her while she felt his hand grip his wrist- one finger extended upward to his palm. He thought he would remember the strength behind her constraint on him forever.
She came up for air and looked at him with tempting eyes. She was daring him to make the next move—and he wasn't not going to accept her dare. He flipped her over for the second time and pulled her leg up around him. She felt herself get lost under his easy touches around her back, up her arms, down her stomach. His teeth nipped at the skin right above her black bra. "I'm the tease, okay." She panted when he pushed down onto her in a slow grinding motion. He unbuttoned his pants, "What happened to taking it slow, hmm?"
"Maybe I liked your idea better." He said.
Clarke smirked, "I need a recording device."
"Me too." He said when he was naked against her leg. He was diamond hard which is the way she liked him.
"I don't think I'm in the mood anymore." She said dismissively but she couldn't conceal her smile.
"That's not even funny." He growled in her ear as one hand worked to remove her remaining clothes. She helped after she decided he was taking too long. Her underwear fell down her leg and tangled in her toes a little before she kicked them off the bed completely. He removed her bra and grazed his lips down her bust until he triggered a small moan which she pulled herself back from making into a very loud one. "Resisting your urges won't do you any favors." He nearly whispered, distracted by how amazing she always seemed to look in the moment before he closed the small space between them. It was her eyes- those blue orbs that let every emotion in and reflected everything he needed to see and everything that hadn't been said. "You're stunning." He let his thoughts slip out of his mouth.
She reddened, "Thank you." Her voice was low as she anticipated the pleasure he was about to give her. She nodded as a way to tell him she was ready. His lips crashed into hers while his body slammed into her. She gasped with tightly closed eyes, their foreheads pressed together- lips only a millimeter apart. He felt the way his body caressed hers as he moved in and out of her time after time. The melody of her moans caused him to reach and put his arm above her head. His position allowed him to angle his cock for deeper penetration. She crumbled beneath him, her hands grasping his shoulders and sliding down to his faint abs. He groaned when her leg wrapped around the back of his knee.
"Clarke" He panted when her nails moved to his back, digging into his skin as he quickened. He went down on her, causing her to throw her head deeper into his bed as she became louder. He thought she was going to draw blood from how hard she was pressing her nails into him. Her breathing was ragged and he knew she was close. Her leg started to drift down his leg when his hand moved back to her lower back. Her hand returned from his back, going up his hair until he was positive it was sticking up in multiple directions.
A wave a hot tingling feelings hit her when he started going faster in her. She couldn't stop it- she couldn't suppress it- she didn't want to. She let her orgasm wash over her like the rain from earlier, a light cry pushing through her lips. Bellamy continued to grind into her, kissing down her skin- tasting her sweat and marveling in her post-orgasmic nature. He followed soon after.
Once he was off her, she rolled over on her stomach. His hand massaged her back while she closed her eyes and buried her face into his pillow. "I'm yours." He said breathlessly.
"I'm yours." She said in the same breathless manner.

XXX

They didn't go all night like planned but somehow, he found that the night had gone better than he thought it would. Her naked curves pressed against him as she slept. The way her leg rested in between his or how her hand rested flatly against his chest made it intimate but for a thousand different reason other than sex.
This wasn't just sex.
This happened to be two people who enjoyed each other's company in an embrace that went beyond sex.
Clarke knew that.
Bellamy knew that.
It fell under the category of unspoken things they didn't know how to say.