🌼wondering🌼ricky bowen

chapter twenty nine.

songs
carry you by ruelle and fleurie

"RICKY--WAIT!" ELLIE TRIED TO CATCH UP WITH HIM. It was then she realized how serious the problem was about their relationship. Ricky didn't want to hear any of this. Because it was too much for him.

"There's you and him, huh? " Ricky stops and started at Ellie.

"No. There's nothing." Ellie froze, didn't know if she should try to reach Ricky. She dreaded for this moment, hurting her love ones because of a lie.

"Nothing? Don't make me stupid. The way he looks at you--" he points.

"I'm saying the truth, Ricky. There's nothing..."

" Could you please be complete honest with me, and say to me that you and Zenith have no past at all."

"Ricky--"

" Just please say it to me..." Ricky let out a sigh and waited for Ellie to speak what he was expecting to answer. But no words came out to her mouth.

"Why did you have to lie to me?"

" I don't know..." was all Ellie could answer. Both of her hands massaging on another trying to comfort herself. But it didn't.

Ricky looks down and waited for Ellie to explain herself. He wanted to Ellie to say everything was just all a prank and not true but nothing. Nothing came.

"Was it the fact that you're still not over him?" then it hit Ellie. She made a hurtful sound with what Ricky asked.

"No... Why would you think that..." her voice cracks. It pains her to think as if he's questioning her love for him.

"I'm sorry Ellie. I need time to think. Everything is... too much." his eyes were gleaming trying to hold the tears.

" Ricky, let's face together--"

"Leave me alone. Before I say some hurtful things, Ellie."

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Holiday break flew so fast as Ellie could put it. With no message or calls from Ricky. She has been calling him after what happened but Flora told her to give him time to think.

Ellie regretted it, though. For not being a complete honest girlfriend. If she could turn back time and change the past. She would've.

At some point, it helped her to be more aware of her feelings. With what Ricky said, of her not really moving on hurt the both of them. But Ellie is 100% sure that Ricky means more than Zenith or anyone else to her.

"Hey, how are you doing?" Her best friend asked as they walk to their History class together.

"No message and no calls. The usual." Ellie sighed.

"You know I can speak to him, right?" Ellie nodded and thanked him but she knew it was their problem not Ty. And she didn't want it to become a distraction to him, especially the performance of the musical is already this month.

"Hey..." they were interrupted by Zenith who stood just in front of History Class.

"Are you seriously going to make another problem at 8 am in the morning?" Ty snapped at the guy. He ignored Ty's comment and waited for the girl to answer. Ellie sighed and nodded which Ty tries to debate on.

"I'll talk to you later." Ellie dismissed without allowing Zenith to reply back.

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"What are you gonna apologize?" Ellie sat down at one of the seats in school cafeteria.

"First of, can I have that pudding?" Ellie rolls her eyes and gave Zenith her pudding since it was his favorite.

"I just want to say, I'm sorry. I'm sorry about what I did. I know it's totally unacceptable of how I acted."
Ellie just nodded and her eyes trails on her food. And realized there was really so many things on her plates both literally and metaphorically speaking.

" It's fine, Zenith. It's not like you can turn back time. "

" Really? Thank you Ellie, it means so much to me."

"But really, why?"

"Why did you do that, Zenith? Why would you go and act such thing?" Zenith made a move that stun Ellie. She felt his hands on her.

"I just wanted to bring back the way things were,L. And seeing you with someone else made me feel... that the one thing that makes me feel better just walks pass me."

"Is there a chance for me to--" he didn't finished when her eyes unexpectedly met the one person that she's wanted to see after the holiday break.

Ricky

"Ricky, wait." she was already on her heels as the boy walks away from the two.

"Ellie, just save it."

" No. I've waited for you to talk to me." the two stood in front each other. Ellie smile sadly at the boy. She missed him so much.

"I'm sure, Ricky" students were now making their way to their class.

"I'm sorry, Ricky. I've not been a complete honest girlfriend. And this break, made me realize something." Ricky could see how convicted the blonde girl on saying what she's feeling.

"I love you, Ricky. I love you ever since you held my hand and risk everything to be in the play. I love you how you joke around. And I have loved you ever since--"

"Ellie,wait. Dont you think we've rush... our relationship?" Ricky blurts which made her as if being splashed by a cold water.

"Wha--"

"I think I needed time to figure something out."

"You're breaking up with me?" as if with a snap everything became inaudible and neutral. And she couldn't believe it, with just one lie that ended their relationship.

With that she hated herself for it.