I work on weekends. Guess who was going to come see me as my shift ends? That's right. Jordan. I felt like I was going to vomit, but in a good way.
Bailey helped me get ready that morning because I had short-circuited while thinking about having to appear decent in front of someone I liked. That hadn't happened in a while. I was glad to do it, even if the beanie I wore kept me from absentmindedly twirling my hair. It was a habit I'd come to forget I had because I only did it when in a daze or too nervous to realize it. Bailey had smacked my hand at least four times that morning, trying to get me to leave my hair alone.
Finally, she had stepped back to admire her work. She inspected my outfit for any flaws. I wore a black beanie, a white t-shirt with the words "humans suck" and an alien printed on it. Over the shirt was a grey flannel and I had black shoes and jeans to top it off. A spritz of cologne and I was feeling better that I had in a long, long time. I don't typically put a ton of effort into my looks.
Bailey pretended to wipe away a tear and said, "I did so well!"
Rolling my eyes, I thanked her and took the car to my job. She had a day off of work and her date with Celeste was tomorrow, so I had permission to use it.
Every mile closer I got to Dawn & Dusk Bakery was another painful twist in my chest. It was getting hard to breathe, but I knew the boredom of waiting for a customer would soon make me feel lighter.
Boy, was I wrong.
I had no idea how persistent my worry was. It's more stubborn than a mule. Much, much more stubborn. It was also more painful than being kicked by one, somehow.
Not only were the butterflies and the weight on my chest painful, but so was the boredom. On one hand, I was jittery, dreading messing up in front of Jordan. On the other, I already knew I would, and I wanted it to be over with so I could see him for the first time, but time was just another stubborn mule. The added feeling of boredom soon began to crush me under its weight.
While I waited, I had to physically restrain myself from screwing up my hair. I would find my hands under my beanie trying to braid it every few seconds and quickly sweep it to the side instead. My hair was wavy and desperately needed a cut, another thing Jordan might find unattractive.
After half an hour of limiting my hair-mussing privileges, my mind began to wander and I gave up trying to save my hair.
All at once, a thought struck me like a sack of bricks, and I reached for my phone.
•
ben?!: how am i supposed to know which person u are. for all i know, u might have already walked in here
_Jordan._: Oh.
ben?!: oops
_Jordan._: Um, I'll wear something specific?
ben?!: what's the most embarrassing thing u have in ur closet
_Jordan._: Myself.
ben?!: oh
ben?!: OH HAHAHAKDNZXJA
_Jordan._: Thank you.
ben?!: i applaud u, but seriously i need to know which weirdo u are
_Jordan._: Found it.
ben?!: tell me what u found
_Jordan._: I have a Donatello t-shirt.
ben?!: no way.
_Jordan._: You'll see.
ben?!: ew no he's the worst turtle tho
_Jordan._: Excuse me?
ben?!: i'm not changing my mind. raphael is the best turtle, admit it
_Jordan._: Um, no? Donatello is the best.
ben?!: literally no one except u thinks that
_Jordan._: You're just salty that you don't have a Donatello shirt as cool as mine.
ben?!: i'll have u know i still own at least ten raphael shirts from my childhood, so i have no reason to be jealous
_Jordan._: That's impressive.
ben?!: thank u
_Jordan._: And yet, all ten can't defeat my Donatello action figures.
ben?!: oh my god
_Jordan._: That's what I thought.
ben?!: ur a dork
_Jordan._: A proud dork.
ben?!: lol
ben?!: when will u get here?
_Jordan._: Can't wait, can you?
ben?!: shut up, i'm bored
_Jordan._: Okay, I'll be there in another half hour. Just hold on.
_Jordan._: And don't get caught with your phone on the job.
ben?!: wouldn't dream of it :)
_Jordan._: See you!
ben?!: see u
•
Talking to Jordan had made me feel a little better about messing up in front of him, if not more insecure. He had the confidence to wear a Donatello shirt. He was too good for me.
Who had that kind of confidence? A god, that's who. I was going on a date with an actual god.
I lied earlier, I didn't feel any better, only more nervous. After a minute of thought, I was back to being a hair-braiding wreck again. I did want to see him, even if the embarrassment killed me.
I decided it would be worth it. Probably.
I'd been talking to him for months, what could possibly go wrong? We had things to talk about, and I could ask to play a game of twenty questions if it gets awkward. Maybe the date wouldn't be so bad. The worst that could happen was that he ended up hating me because I offended him in some way and he ghosted me until I relapsed into depression.
No big deal.
It was what felt like an eternity and six mini braids later that I spotted him.
It was him.
My hands felt sweaty and I found it hard to breathe. My heartbeat quickened, making me feel helpless. The whole crush thing was getting exhausting and uncomfortable, but things were coming to an end.
I was near the end of this stressed fiasco because I saw him.
My stomach dropped painfully at the unmistakable recognition. The worst that could happen was no longer the worst that could happen, because this was the worst that could possibly happen.
Ira.
He was about to open the doors to the bakery, but I ducked under the counter. Panicking, I crawled for the bathroom as quickly as possible without alerting him.
Somehow, I made my way to the bathroom without him seeing me. Reminiscing over the day I'd joined art class, I locked myself in a stall. That seemed to be a new trend when Ira was around, but I thought it was justified today.
Not because of my date. It wasn't that at all. Well, sort of. I tried to untangle my jumble of thoughts, attempting to make sense of what I'd just seen.
What was he doing here? He had such bad timing! Couldn't he come at another time on another day? He really couldn't stand to give me a break for the weekend, could he?
No matter how hard I tried to deny it, I already knew the answer to my questions. There was no running now–I'd already seen enough.
He'd been wearing a shirt. It was dorky, but it was unmistakably Donatello the ninja turtle.
What was the worst that could happen? I think I found my answer.
YOU ARE READING
We're Okay
Teen FictionBen is in a slump. After his "girlfriend" dumps him, he begins to feel his life is in a downward spiral. With a little crew of bullies with bad hair days every day and very few people to depend on, he's got a time bomb hovering over him, counting do...
