kathleen

26

kathleen's pov:
"van, what happened last night?" i ask, puzzled about more things than i'd like to even think about.
"to be honest with you, i don't know love. all i know is we're together, and to me that's all that matters." he replies. "i know, but i don't want us to be together for the sake of it. just because we said some stupid stuff to each other because we were drunk." i blurt out, without even thinking about it. "are you sure you want this van?"
"yes of course i am kath, i love you!" he replies, almost shocked at the fact that i even asked.
"how can you even forgive me?"
"are you seriously asking me this again?" i can see him getting frustrated.
"i'm sorry i-,"
"just leave it ok?"
"van, how can i leave it? i hurt you. and i can't live with myself for it. i think about it every night, and i just wish that i could go back in time and change it all. but the reality is that i can't van. so i need to know that you've forgiven me. i want our relationship to be real."
"is that what this is about kath? validation? knowing that i forgive you so you clear your conscience?"
"no, van, but i can't go into a relationship with you knowing that you're still angry at me, even in the slightest,"
"well here's your answer: i'm not angry. i'm hurt,"
my eyes start to water again. i don't want to cry and i try my best to hold it in, but that makes it worse.
"i'm going for a smoke." he storms out, shutting the door behind him. i just made him leave his own house. god i feel awful. i don't know what to do anymore. my tears are streaming down my face, staining my cheeks. i just want to shut myself away from the world.

1 hour later

van's pov:
i can't live with her and can't live without her. i miss her already. why do we keep falling out. it's like we're not meant to be even though we can't bare to be without each other. i'm round the corner from the flat, when i think i hear someone singing 26. surely not. i get round the corner and i realise it's kathleen. she's left the window open and she's using my guitar. god she's got the most beautiful voice, and it makes me fall in love with her all over again. is there anything she can't do? by the time i get back up to the flat she's stopped singing. i go to open the door and i realise that i had forgot my key. "kath," i call from outside the door. "it's me. i'm sorry. will you let me in, love?" no answer. "i heard you singing 26. i didn't even know you had listened to our songs. you've got a beautiful voice, y'know?" still nothing. "cmon kath im sorry. i shouldn't have been like that with you. i still love you. i always will." i say, almost pleading with her.
"i love you too." i hear her say. her voice is breaking as if she's crying. the door opens to her in floods of tears. i cocoon my arms around her shoulders and let her head rest on me.